A Whisper of Disgrace

‘You’re late,’ he observed caustically. ‘And your face is covered in make-up.’

She touched her fingertips to her cheek and they came away the deep bronze colour of the heavy studio foundation. ‘I wanted to get away as quickly as possible.’ She drew in a deep breath and smiled. ‘To get home to you.’

‘That’s very considerate of you, but have you forgotten that we were supposed to have been going out tonight?’

‘Out?’ She looked at him blankly, and then clapped her hand over her mouth in horror. ‘Cocktails at the French Embassy!’ she breathed. ‘Oh, Kulal—it slipped my mind completely. But it’s not too late, is it? We can still go.’

‘It is too late, and the sheikh is never late,’ he snapped. ‘It would be an unspeakable diplomatic breach!’

‘I’m sorry.’

With a growing feeling of frustration, Kulal stared at her, wanting to kiss her and yet wanting to rail against her all at the same time. Did she think that this situation she had manufactured was in any way acceptable to him? That he would ever tolerate being consigned to second place in her life? ‘Obviously you’re having difficulty fitting me into your busy schedule, Rosa.’

‘That’s not fair. My work hardly impacts on your life at all. Why didn’t you remind me this morning?’

‘Because it is not my place to remind you!’ he bit out as he found himself longing for the days when she’d always been there, waiting. When he’d needed to do nothing but open the front door before she would be nestling in his arms—a package of curvaceous warmth and eager kisses. He remembered the way they used to sit on the terrace and watch the sun going down, before the lights of the city brought it to vivid life once more. ‘You think I have nothing better to do than to act as your social secretary?’

‘No, Kulal,’ she said tiredly. ‘I don’t think that.’

She went into the bathroom to shower away the heavy make-up, and when she returned she thought that his mood was better. But maybe that was because she was wearing a light summer dress which came to just above the knee. She could see the instinctive gleam of his black eyes as he pulled her into his arms and kissed her. One kiss led to another, and then another—and sex always made Kulal feel better. Actually, it usually did the same for her, but today she was left feeling strangely empty as she lay in his arms afterwards.

The weather that weekend was amazing—the sky a clear and vaulted blue and the sunshine bright and golden as it shone down on one of the world’s most beautiful cities. They spent Saturday morning in one of the flea markets, followed by a stroll around the Tuileries after lunch. Most of Sunday took place in bed.

‘Doesn’t this feel fantastic?’ murmured Kulal as he traced lazy circles all over her stomach. ‘And don’t you feel fantastic—all soft and sensual?’

Sensation shivered over her. Yes, it felt fantastic. It always did. Rosa felt her heart clench, knowing that she was going to miss this when the year was up. Could she ever imagine being physically intimate with another man like this? She shuddered. Never in a million years! Could she imagine a life without Kulal full stop? A sudden darkness crept into her heart as she nestled closer to his naked body. ‘Do you ever think about what’s going to happen when we dissolve the marriage?’ she questioned.

‘There’s no point,’ Kulal said, but her question had destroyed the mood and he rolled away from her. He had learnt never to project—even though sometimes he saw the dark wings of the future flapping ominously on the periphery of his vision. ‘We made a decision and we’re sticking to it. What’s to think about?’

Rosa watched as he got out of bed and headed for the door, returning a few minutes later with two glasses of white wine. She took hers and began to sip at it, but her thoughts were troubled and she couldn’t seem to shake them off. She’d told herself right from the beginning that she didn’t believe in love. That she wasn’t looking for love—but wasn’t it peculiar how sometimes love seemed to come looking for you? How it could creep up on you and wrap its velvet fingers around your heart without you realising—even when the man in question could be stubborn, demanding and autocratic? Reason seemed to have no effect on her volatile emotions and she knew why.

She had fallen in love with her sheikh husband even though that was the last thing which either of them wanted.

No further mention was made of the future which meant that by Monday morning the atmosphere between them was serene. The missed party at the embassy was long forgotten and the goodbye kiss they shared as Kulal left for the office was lingering.