Holding Onto Forever

“Someone’s hungry,” Quinn says as he sets me down at the table.

“She needs her strength for when she starts PT.” Dad places his hand on my head and smooths my hair down, careful not to touch the scar I now have. I’ve contemplated shaving my head, but the thought of being bald makes me cry. Still, I’m going to be forced to make a decision soon because it’s going to take years for my hair to grow back to where the rest of it is now.

A mound of food is placed in front of me, and yet another gurgling sound emits from my stomach, causing everyone to laugh. If I never have to eat another meal at the hospital, it’ll be too soon. Halfway through the meal, my cell vibrates. I look down at my lap and at the unfamiliar number, wondering if I should even read it. Very few people have my number and the one time I answered an unknown call, it was Dessie, telling me in some very unfavorable language to stay away from Noah. I didn’t even know he was dating her at the time. It was shortly after prom… and I thought things were going to be different for us.

My cell vibrates again with another text. Everyone around the table is in full conversation so I open it up.

Hey, it’s Kyle. My lawyer says we aren’t supposed to talk, but I have to know if you’re okay.

I look around the table to make sure no one is watching me. My parents frown on us answering our phones at the table, but something tells me I should respond to Kyle.

I’m good. Sore. Can’t walk. But I’m good.

No sooner do I send the message, does the conversation bubble pop up.

I’m unbelievably sorry, Peyton. If you’ll let me, I’ll make it up to you.

Do I want that? Do I want to see Kyle?

That’d be great.

I pocket my phone before anyone at the table gets suspicious. Everyone continues to talk, about Christmas, New Year’s, whatever else is going on while I sit here in a daze, wondering what Kyle’s doing and whether Noah went home for the holidays. What I really want to know is why Aunt Josie hasn’t told my mom she’s going to be a grandma.

Xander’s gym is massive. I remember when I was younger and he started his own place in Beaumont, thinking it was huge. Elle and I used to go there and take dance classes with our aunt Yvie, but they soon moved to Los Angeles where Xander set his sights on becoming the premiere sports therapists. His client list is massive. Every professional athlete wants to work with him, and if they’re not, they’re using one of his employees.

The gym is private and mostly for the elite. Right now, it’s bustling with celebrities. I’m in heaven, looking at all the football players I want to interview some day. A few come up to me, telling me they heard about the accident, saying things like how Kyle is a good guy and I should give him a chance. For the most part, I think nothing of it because I’m sure news has traveled. It’s not like the players don’t gossip. Most of them are worse than women.

Xander has me curling weight with my one good arm. Says I need upper arm strength first before I can start rehabbing my leg. He hasn’t come out and said it, but I know I can’t walk. I’ve tried when I’m in my room, to go from one side to the other by hopping. My left leg is weak. It wobbles under any amount of pressure, and if I set my bad foot on the ground, it does nothing. No amount of mind control can get it to move.

“Another set and we’ll move on,” Xander says. I pull the dumbbell toward my chest and release it slowly, feeling the ache in my arm. My forearm quivers as I grit my teeth, trying to keep it steady. “Good girl.” He takes the weight from me and sets it back on the rack.

“I don’t know, what do you think?” I flex and show off the fact I’ve gained zero muscle so far today.

“I think I need to know your secret?”

I turn at the voice behind me. Kyle is standing there, smiling. His foot is in a walking boot and I’m instantly jealous.

“My secret to what?” I ask, instead of saying hi.

He nods toward Xander, who doesn’t look thrilled at the moment. “I tried to hire him, but was rejected.”

I shrug. “Family obligation. Xander’s my uncle. This is Kyle Zimmerman,” I tell Xander.

“I know who he is. He should get back to training.” Xander scoops me up and carries me to another machine. After he sets me down, he tells me we’re going to work my right leg for a bit.