Until Sage (Until Him 2)

I drop my face to her shoulder as I absently hear the sound of the doorbell ring through the house.

“I’m sorry, Kim,” she says, and I squeeze my eyes closed as a sob I can’t hold in any longer rips painfully from my chest.

Suddenly, Ashlyn is gone and the familiar scent of Sage is cocooning me. Burying my face in his shirt, I hold on to him and cry while his hands smooth over my hair and he whispers soothingly into my ear. It takes a long time to stop crying, and when I’m finally able to pull myself together, I’m exhausted and a headache has started to pound behind my closed eyelids.

“I shouldn’t have told her,” I hear Ashlyn say from close by, and I pull my face away from Sage’s now soaked shirt and open my eyes to look at my friend, who is standing under her husband’s arm, nervously wringing her hands together.

“I need…,” I croak out then rest my hand against my dry throat. “I—”

“Drink,” Sage commands, cutting me off by taking my free hand and pressing my bottle of water into it. His worried eyes scan my face as my hand holding the bottle shakes. Wrapping his hand around mine, he holds the bottle steady, repeating, “Drink,” as he tips it toward my mouth.

Taking a sip with his help, I sit up. Wiping at my cheeks, I pull in a much-needed, deep breath before looking at Ashlyn once more. “I needed to know,” I tell her, thankful my voice no longer cracks, even though it still feels raw from the tears I’ve cried. “I needed to know,” I repeat, and she nods, biting her lip as tears fill her eyes again.

“She saved me. I owe her everything,” she whispers, and I let those words wash through me and clean away the anger I’ve been holding on to.

No one knows why things happen the way they do. I just hope my sister is resting in peace. This life wasn’t always fair to Kelly. Yes, a lot of what happened to her was her own doing, but having been raised the way she was, it’s sadly understandable why she acted out the way she did. Why she couldn’t just accept good things when they came into her life, and why she was always waiting for the floor to crumble from beneath her feet.

Fighting back the new wave of tears I feel creeping up on me, I dig my nails into the palm of my hand until they’re gone, then stand, and go to my friend on shaky legs. I hate that she had to go through what she went through, but I’m glad Kelly was able to save her before she died.

“I love you,” she whispers as we embrace in the middle of the room.

“I love you, too. Thank you for telling me what happened, and thank you for giving me a little bit of closure,” I say, and her arms tighten before she releases a shaky breath and lets me go. Pulling in a breath of my own, I wipe at my face once more, having no doubt I look a mess. I’m sure my makeup is now all over my face and Sage’s shirt.

Sage.

I turn to look at him and blink. I knew he was here, since I cried all over him, but it didn’t really hit me until right now that he is here. He’s back. I want to run across the room to him and throw myself against his chest in happiness and relief, but I don’t do that. I stare at him like an idiot then mutter, “You’re back.”

“Yeah.”

“I….”

“We’ll be in the kitchen,” Dillon mumbles behind me, and I look over my shoulder and watch him lead Ashlyn out of the room.

“Kim.” My head swings toward Sage and I lick my lips in sudden nervousness. “Come here.” He pats the seat next to him, and I look at the couch then him.

“Did you get the guy?” I ask, and he frowns.

“Yeah, why are you looking at me like that?”

“Like what?”

“Like you wanna run away.”

“I don’t look like that,” I lie, knowing I do look like that, because there is a part of me that does want to run from him. The part of me that just realized he’s back and my parents are gone. I have no excuse to use when things between the two of us start to get too intense, and things between us tend to get intense when we’re just standing in the same room breathing the same air. It’s not about his hands or his mouth on me. It’s his presence that affects me. He has the ability to become the sun I so desperately need in order to survive, and I’m afraid if I allow myself to feel all that warmth, when he’s gone, I won’t be able to live in the shadows.