Until Cobi (Until Him 3)
After I hang up on the last call, I go get back into bed with her. The moment I do, she turns to me and fits herself against my side in her sleep. I hold her close and stay awake through the night so that if she wakes up I’m there to make sure she’s okay. She doesn’t wake up, not until my phone on the nightstand rings with a call from her dad, letting me know the hospital called to tell him that Charlene passed away.
Chapter 14
Hadley
SITTING ON LIZ AND Trevor’s very comfortable couch in their beautiful house, I scan the living room and kitchen, taking each person in. The space is crowded with Cobi’s entire family—aunts and uncles, cousins I met before today, and others I met just a few hours ago, along with some of their significant others—Brie, and Kenyon. Everyone is standing or sitting while chatting, eating, and drinking. All of them gathered together because of me.
My eyes catch on Harmony’s, and she gives me a sad but reassuring smile. I give her a small smile in return then look down at my lap, pulling in a breath. Today was my mother’s funeral. Not an actual funeral—my dad couldn’t afford to have one for her, and I could only help out so much with the cost of what we did have. The service was small; a few people from the bar my mom worked at showed up, along with Dad, some of his friends, then me, and this room full of people made up the rest.
Cobi’s parents’ pastor came to say a few words at the gravesite before my mother’s cheap casket was lowered into the ground, and his aunts all brought flowers to be tossed in on top before the earth was settled over her. It was nice, much nicer than my mom probably deserved.
At that thought, my throat gets tight, but not for the reasons it should. It’s tight, because over the last few days, I’ve had to accept that my mom’s and my relationship will never be more than what it was when she was alive. I didn’t really like her much. I never felt a bond or a connection to her. She was just my mom, the woman who gave birth to me, nothing more, and that’s a hard pill to swallow, especially after spending so much time with Cobi’s family.
It’s difficult at times to watch them interact, to see them tease each other and be affectionate. They all genuinely care about one another’s well-being and happiness. They are the definition of family—real family. Something I never experienced before.
When weight settles into my side, I lift my head and look at Brie.
“You okay?” she asks, studying me.
“Yeah.”
“Liar.” She grins, bumping her shoulder into mine. Then her expression turns serious. “I wish I knew what to say to make this easier for you, but I know there are no words to make it better.” She takes one of my hands, locking our fingers together. “But it will get easier. The more time that passes, the less pain you’ll feel every day.”
I know she’s speaking from experience. I know that’s how it is for her after losing both her parents. But our stories aren’t even close to the same.
“We weren’t even a little close. To me, she was just someone I knew, who happened to be my mom. I’m just trying to come to terms with that,” I admit, feeling somewhat guilty for not being devastated by the loss of my own mother.
“Hadley, I know you and know you believed somewhere deep down that maybe she’d change one day. And now it sucks, because you’ll never get that answer. That’s the pain you’re going to have to work through,” she says firmly but quietly.
“It’s scary how well you know me.”
“We’ve been besties forever. I know you better than you know yourself.” She squeezes my fingers.
I crush hers in return, muttering, “True.”
“On the bright side, you’ve got a lot of people who are here for you while you work through that, so you’re not alone.”
I look away from her and glance around the room again. My eyes land on Cobi, who’s chatting with his cousin July’s husband, a guy named Wes, who I met this afternoon. Both men are laughing about whatever they are talking about. Feeling my eyes on him, Cobi looks at me and his face softens. At that look, my heart flips and my stomach bottoms out.
I have no doubt I’m in love with him. He’s taken care of me since the moment we met, reassured me when I’ve had doubts, and pushed through every one of my defenses. I’ve never met a man like him before, and I know that’s because men like him only exist in romance novels, fairy tales, and Disney movies. But somehow, he’s living and breathing.