Saving Lawson (Loving Lawson 2)

She stopped abruptly when she saw what her words were doing to me. I was tense, nostrils flared, completely enraged she was bringing this up. She was well aware how sensitive the topic was to me. It wasn’t something we talked about ever.

“So,” I harshly said, “your excuse for hating the guy is because he was new to town around the time I had to get the money? If that’s the case, your list of people to hate must be pretty long.”

“I just want to know where he came from. That’s all. After what happened, we can’t just let anyone into our lives.”

“He came from here, Allie! From Hedley! He’d been gone for a while, and then he came back –”

“But why did he come back?!”

I’d had enough nonsense. She was paranoid. Absolutely paranoid to suggest Marko had bad intentions. To say that he had been instrumental to my loss. I called bullshit.

“There’s nothing wrong with Marko,” I told her sternly on my way out of the kitchen. “What’s wrong is your disinterest in getting to know someone close to me.”

“He’s not right,” she shot back with conviction. “I just know it.”

I glanced over my shoulder at her and said with finality, “You know wrong.”

Allie

I was fuming that night.

You know wrong, he’d said.

That was bullshit. Whatever bromance was going on between Heath and Marko was getting ridiculous now and I was reaching the end of my rope. As if to throw it in my face, Marko showed up at the apartment while Heath was preparing for the fight.

When I opened the door, he practically pushed me aside to let himself in. All the while he was smirking wickedly at me, like he knew he could get away with this behaviour and there was nothing I could do about it. I stared daggers at him, feeling that usual off vibe coming out of him. He unsettled me, and I couldn’t understand why the girls went crazy for him. Surely they heard the rumours too.

“How’s it going, Allie?” he asked me in his low voice.

“It’s going,” I replied coldly, crossing my arms.

We waited a few minutes for Heath to get out of the bathroom, and we spent every second of it staring at each other. He kept his smirk alive while I glowered. Did you rape your sister? I wanted to ask. Did you hurt her boyfriend because you’re a jealous, crazy man?

“Saw your new place,” he then said, disrupting my thoughts.

Of course he’s seen it. Knowing Heath, he’d probably dragged Marko to it and asked for his opinion. I didn’t like that he was already involved. If he knew where we lived, he’d be knocking that door down too and shoving his way inside.

“It’s pretty great,” he added.

“It is,” I agreed passively.

“Said it was close to your school too.”

I nodded once.

He took the hint of my disinterest and didn’t press for more conversation, but he continued looking at me. The humour was still there; he knew I didn’t like him, yet he stuck around with so much ease, like it was completely trivial to him.

Heath interrupted our staring contest, stopping at the threshold of the kitchen to glance wearily at the two of us.

“All set?” Marko asked him, looking about Heath like he was inspecting him for something.

Heath nodded carefully, holding tight the duffel bag strap. “Yeah, man.”

“Got everything?”

I raised a brow, wondering what the hell was up with the weird look Heath shot Marko in return. “Yeah,” he answered tightly. “Got… everything.”

Marko shrugged innocently and turned to the front door. I stared hard at Heath, trying to figure out why he was suddenly acting… peculiar. He caught my look and moved to me. Ever since this afternoon’s random proposal – and rejection – he’d been completely flat.

He kissed me quickly and muttered, “I’ll see you later. I might be a little late tonight. The guys wanted to have a quick catch up after the fight, so…”

“That’s fine.”

“Okay. Love you, Allie.”

“Love you too.”

They got out of there, not a word exchanged from either of them. When they left, I sank against the counter and stared at the door for minutes on end. There was a strange feeling in my chest, like something wasn’t right.

With a slow pace and an oddly heavy heart, I cleaned up the apartment and tended to Kayden when he woke up for a feed. I tried to shake my unease away, thinking that what happened this afternoon was the cause for it. Heath had been off because he felt rejected and hurt. I hated causing him pain, but there was no way in hell I was going to jump into marriage, even if Heath was the only person I could ever see myself with.

He saw right through my excuse, although it was partially true. Truth was, I didn’t want to dive into marriage because of Kayden. He would grow and come to learn just who his real father was. I was petrified of what he might think of me when he realized I had torn apart two brothers.

It was never my intention. It was never something I aspired to do, because who the hell wakes up one morning thinking, “Yeah, two hot brothers – time to break ‘em up!” Yeah, no. That was not at all up there on my list of priorities. I was being judged for it every single day I stepped out of the apartment and passed people who knew us, or knew of us. Why would anyone want to put themselves in this kind of position?

I wanted to protect Kayden from the same judgment. This meant at the moment, I needed to keep things as uncomplicated as possible. Just until I figured this shit out, anyway. I had so many questions I needed to ask Ryker. I felt like I couldn’t live my life being a hundred percent content with everything if I didn’t clear up the past.

You need to tell Heath the rest of your reason, I thought. I decided when he returned I’d smooth it out and explain my hesitation. That way he wouldn’t think I was rejecting him. Hell, maybe he’d make me see it in a different light and it would stop bothering me altogether.

Maybe he could even change my opinion of Marko. He clearly knew a lot about him, and he hadn’t been surprised at all when I brought up the rumours. I could see how unfair I was judging him, but he still made me uneasy.

I spent the next couple hours studying, and when I checked the time, I figured Heath would have finished his fight and was probably hanging out with the guys now. Deciding to call him, I grabbed my phone and dialled his number. I hoped he was in a better mood. I didn’t want us feeling distant even for a minute.