Nothing Left to Lose (Guarded Hearts 1)

“This is what I’m talking about! You’re not listening to me,” she spat, waving her hand at me in example. “I have to do what’s best for me now, and that’s coping with all this shit the only way I know how. I don’t need to be dealing with some emotionally draining love sick puppy too!”

I didn’t believe her. Her words were harsh, hurtful and full of acid as she said them, but deep down, I knew that she loved me. This was about something else, something that I didn’t understand and that she didn’t want to explain to me. I decided to try another tactic.

“What about what’s best for me? Have you considered me in any of this?” I shot back.

Anger crossed her face as she slapped me hard in the middle of my chest. “Considered you? Of course I f**king have, you stupid,” she slapped my chest again, “annoying,” slap, “frustrating,” another slap, “son of a bitch!” With both hands she shoved me towards the door. “Just get the hell out. Go back to LA. Live your life, sleep with some girls, move on and forget the screwed up, little, rich girl that you f**ked a few times!” She yanked open the front door while I stared at her, dumbstruck. My tactic had apparently blown up in my face and had just succeeded in making her angry on top of resigned.

“Anna...” I whispered, fighting for something I could say or do to make her reconsider. She needed me here.

She shook her head as she looked up at the four new agents and Dean, who were standing outside the door, probably hearing every word of what had just gone on. “Make sure he gets on his plane,” she stated, pushing open the door before turning back to me. “I’ll pack up your stuff and forward it on in a couple of days. Goodbye, Agent Taylor. Take care of yourself.” She then proceeded to walk calmly into the bedroom, closing the door behind her, leaving me in the hallway with my heart in my throat.

My mouth hung open in shock. I hadn’t even seen this coming. Everything was perfect before the news about Carter, and now she was trying to fool me into believing that she didn’t love me and that I meant nothing to her. It hurt like hell.

Every muscle in my body was screaming for me to run after her and hold her. I couldn’t leave her, not now. Carter would come for her eventually and she needed me to protect her. A hand clamped on my arm, I looked down to see it belonged to one of the new agents.

“Agent Taylor, my orders are to remove you by force if necessary. I’d much rather it not come to that,” he warned.

I looked over at Dean, shocked. “What the hell just happened?” I asked, still confused at the turn of events. It didn’t feel real. It felt like a nightmare was unfolding in front of me. Maybe it is actually a nightmare, maybe I’m still sleeping…

Dean shook his head. “I don’t really know, Ashton. The President called me and said that Annabelle had requested a transfer and that I’m taking your position. I was told I wasn’t allowed to tell you until the four guards arrived,” he replied, looking just as baffled as me.

“But they can’t transfer me, you need me here! She needs me here!” I cried desperately.

“Ashton, I said that to the President, but he said it was already done and that was the end of the discussion,” Dean explained, shaking his head sadly.

“Damn it,” I growled. “Anna!” I shouted, turning to go back into the apartment again. Another guard grabbed my other arm. I looked at him warningly. “You’d better take your f**king hands off me if you still want to be able to use them,” I spat angrily. No one would keep me from my girl.

Dean stepped forward quickly. “Ashton, just go to LA, call her later once she’s had time to think this all through. I’ll talk to her, but for now you need to go along with your orders. If you go against a Presidential order, then you won’t even get to come back here when she changes her mind again,” he suggested, looking at me pleadingly. I squeezed my eyes shut. “Just go. I’ll talk to her. You just do as you’ve been ordered,” Dean persuaded.

I nodded, knowing he was right. LA was only an hour flight away from here, by the time I landed in LA, she would have cooled down and I’d fly back. It would be fine. A small part of me knew that it wouldn’t, but all I had left was hope. Anna was my life. I couldn’t be away from her, she was everything to me and she needed me to protect her.

I turned to Dean. “Take care of her until I get back then,” I pleaded. “You know how important this girl is to me.”

He nodded, smiling sadly as he patted my shoulder sympathetically. “Yeah, I do. Don’t worry. I’ll go talk to her right now. She may even change her mind before you get on the damn plane. You know what women are like, temperamental beasts, and Anna is the worst of them all, feisty little sucker her,” he joked.

I didn’t have the words to answer so I just stalked to the elevator, pressing the button. Two of the four new guards took my flanks, watching me cautiously as if waiting for me to sneak an attack on them or something.

Neither of them would talk to me on the way to the airport. Every time I asked anything, they just said they didn’t know. Eventually, I stopped asking questions and rested my head on the window, feeling my heart break a little more with every mile they put between us. When we got to the airport, they booked me onto my plane. The timing was perfect; I only had to wait thirty minutes before boarding. I sat on my own with my head in my hands, praying that Dean was right and that he could talk some sense into her before I even boarded. Out of sheer desperation, I grabbed my phone and called her, it rang a couple of times before she rejected it. I squeezed my eyes shut and called her again.