Nothing Left to Lose (Guarded Hearts 1)

I rolled to my side so I was facing him. He was watching me with a contented smile on his face. A soft giggle escaped my lips because of his awed expression. The way he was looking at me made my tummy flutter due to the intensity of it. I smiled and reached up, pushing his hair off his sweaty forehead, guiding it to stand up on end. I chuckled wickedly as it stayed in that position. Messy sex hair certainly suited him.

“Well, I’d say you just added a whole new chapter to the ‘how to be a bodyguard’ book. I don’t think I’ve ever had a person guard my body that closely before,” I teased, blushing as I said it.

He laughed and tightened his arm across my body, clamping me to his side. “Mmm, I think I’m gonna be good at this body guarding job. I take my job incredibly seriously,” he purred, trailing his fingers down my spine, making me shiver.

“Ashton, do you mind if I count that as my first time? I mean, my real first time wasn’t something I want to remember.” The words tumbled from my mouth before I could even contemplate how embarrassing they would be. I winced, horrified.

“I would be honoured, Miss Spencer,” he replied, dipping his head and kissing me softly.

I smiled against his mouth, slipping one arm around his neck. When his arm tightened on me and he rolled onto his back, I squeaked, giggling as I was dragged on top of him. His hand slipped down to cup my ass as the kiss deepened, growing in intensity again. When the kiss finally broke, I dragged in a ragged breath. The room seemed to be too hot and stuffy. I needed a little air. Gulping nervously, I sat up, straddling him. He smiled up at me, folding one arm under his head as his other hand drew a lazy pattern on my thigh.

The way he was looking at me made a blush creep up my neck and spread across my face. Neither of us spoke. Suddenly, my cell phone started vibrating on my bedside cabinet, cutting through the silence and making us both jump. Leaning over and snagging the phone from the side, I frowned down at the number that belonged to my father.

“Dad?” I answered, suddenly now very aware that I was naked with my near guard laid out between my thighs.

Ashton’s body jerked as his eyes widened.

“Hi, Annabelle. I wanted to speak to Agent Taylor, but he’s not answering his cell. I wondered if he was with you?” my dad quizzed.

My mouth popped open in shock as I tried to come up with some lie that would placate him. “Um, no Ashton’s not with me.” I winced, looking at him for help. “I think he said he was going for… er…” Ashton suddenly used his hand to mime his fingers dancing across the palm of his hand. I raised one eyebrow. “A dance class?” I guessed. Ashton chuckled quietly, shaking his head and slapping his forehead with the palm of his hand.

“A dance class?” my father repeated incredulously.

I closed my eyes as I suddenly realised what Ashton was actually miming. Someone running. Hmm, that would have been a better excuse. I sighed. “Dad, look, I don’t know where he is, alright? For all I know he could be at a dance class. He’s probably gone for a run or something,” I snapped, covering the mouthpiece of my phone as Ashton’s chuckle turned into an outright laugh.

“Right, okay, well if you see him, could you ask him to come and speak to me about some arrangements for next week?” my dad requested.

“Sure thing,” I answered, pressing the end button and dropping my phone down onto the bed.

“Dance class?” Ashton teased, shaking his head at me.

I sighed and flopped down onto the bed. “He wants to see you to talk about some arrangements for next week,” I stated, wanting to change the subject.

He frowned but nodded; clearly now wondering what my father wanted to see him about. Settling himself down against my side, he ran his fingers through my hair. “You’re so beautiful,” he whispered, leaning in and planting a soft kiss on the tip of my nose. I smiled as his eyes latched onto mine and I became trapped in the beautiful green of them. After a couple of minutes of silence, he groaned. “I’d better go speak to your father.” He pushed himself up onto all fours, leaning over me, kissing me fiercely. “I’ll see you in a bit. Maybe we could go for a walk or something?”

“Yeah okay, sure,” I agreed, shrugging.

He kissed down the side of my neck and across my body, lingering on my br**sts, then climbed out of the bed, frowning and not looking too happy about having to leave. I watched his pert, little behind as he pulled on his boxer shorts, picked up his weapons from the night before, and then strutted confidently to the door.

Just before he stepped out of my room, he turned back to me and a cocky smile slipped onto his face. “I knew you’d fall for me sooner or later. And thanks very much, ma’am,” he stated, winking before stepping out and closing the door firmly behind him.

My heart dropped down into my stomach. Fall for him? I haven’t fallen for him, I love Jack. Oh my God… Jack! My eyes widened in horror as my head whipped to the side, seeing the photo on my sideboard. He was smiling at me as usual. I started to feel nauseous; I ran to the bathroom and was sick violently until nothing else would come out.

Turning the shower to as hot as it would go, I climbed in, sobbing under the spray. My tears mingled with the water jets, circling down the drain as I scrubbed the sex smell from my skin.

When I got out, I still didn’t feel better. It wasn’t the dirty feeling that sometimes overcame me when I thought about Carter, no, this was worse in some ways. I literally repulsed myself from the inside out. I’d just done that with Ashton, and hadn’t even spared Jack a single thought until it was too late.