The Sheikh's Claim (Desert Nights 2)
“I certainly hope he won’t!”
“But he’ll tell everyone about Baba Jalal,” she exclaimed.
His face relaxed in such a smile, indulgent and proud. “I certainly hope he would.”
She shook her head, implications falling into place, each a new blow. “I’ll have to leave Uncle’s home and go live in that hotel until we leave Azmahar so he won’t be exposed to anyone.”
“There’s no need for any of that. You can tell everyone now.”
She gaped at him. “You know I can’t do that. One scandal already consumed most of my family’s lives. I won’t cause them another. And it’s out of the question for you, now of all times. With your campaign, the last thing you need is a scandal of the caliber of an illegitimate child.”
He took her by the shoulders, his face gripped with fierce emotions. “Adam is not any such thing. He is my son and I’ll proclaim him my heir in front of the whole world.”
She had no answer to that. For what felt like eternity.
Then she could barely whisper, “Y-you can’t do that.”
“I can and I will. I have a son and I will be his father, in every way possible.”
Suddenly a suspicion spread through her like wildfire. She pushed away his hands as if they burned her. “If you’re thinking you can take him from me…”
He raised both hands as if to ward off a blow, his expression agonized. “Don’t even complete that thought. Ya Ullah, you think I would even consider such a thing?”
She shook her head slowly, confusion rising. “It’s just I don’t see how else you’d do all…that.”
“I will do it the one and only way. We will get married.”
Ten
“We can’t do that.”
Lujayn’s ready rejection hit a bull’s-eye in Jalal’s heart.
It hadn’t even been an exclamation, but a statement.
His gaze left hers, moved to that miracle that was their son sleeping so peacefully facedown over his thick, colorful blanket on the floor. Adam felt already integrated into his being, as if he’d been a part of him since long before he’d been born. Like she was. Their presence had turned this place into a home. The intensity with which he wanted to claim them, have them with him, forming the most vital parts of his life, was frightening, exhilarating, transfiguring.
But he was just beginning to wrap his mind around what Lujayn had suffered, from childhood up till this day. He didn’t have the right to feel bad that her first reaction was to reject the idea of marrying him out of hand, even after she’d made soul-searing love with him last night, and had already borne him Adam.
He had to put her needs as his first and only priority. From now on, everything would be about her. And Adam. About his family.
Emptying his face and voice of any emotion that might push her in the wrong direction, he asked, “Any reason why we can’t?”
“How about every reason?”
“I can only see we have every reason to get married. Each other, Adam…”
“We don’t have each other, we just slept together a couple times during the last two years.”
“I would have been in your bed every night of those two years if you hadn’t told me you hated me. It was why I walked away....”
“If you respected or valued me, nothing I said would have made you walk away,” she cut him off, her eyes feverish. “But you despised and mistrusted me, when you had no reason to. You felt I betrayed you, but betrayal is when you give something of yourself, and someone takes it and screws you over. You gave me nothing, so what was there to betray? I exercised my right to self-preservation and you came after me, maligning and accusing. And you walked away because you always intended to, never looking back. Then I came here and you wanted to have more no-strings fun. Then you discover Adam and suddenly you want to marry me? I don’t think so.”
Every word gouged him deeper for being true. “I confess to all my crimes against you, Lujayn. You gave without taking, never gave me reason to mistrust you. You told me why you were leaving, but I couldn’t accept it. All I could think of was my disappointment, my pain. The more I thought about it in your absence, the more I twisted everything to soothe my wounds. I am wired to think the worst of everyone first if it would explain their behavior. It comes from having Sondoss for a mother. But I’m never mistrusting you, and I’m never walking away, ever again.”
Those ready tears filled her eyes, making them flash like diamonds. “For God’s sake, don’t even pretend this has anything to do with me. You only want to marry me for Adam.”
“Legitimizing Adam is only a factor in the timing but—”
“Did you ever think of marrying me before?”
He wanted to say yes. But there’d never be anything but the whole truth between them from now on. “In the past, I never thought of getting married, no. I thought there was no reason to.”
Her lips twisted. “There you go. And there’s no reason still.”
“I didn’t mean it the way you’re taking it. You know now I thought we had it all. I didn’t think marriage was in either of our horizons. We were too busy, and I thought you were too young, and with your career, wouldn’t afford the distraction of marriage let alone the responsibility of a family.”
Her eyes narrowed to silver lasers. “Are you saying you did think of marriage and decided against it?”
“I’m saying I didn’t think of it for all those reasons, not the ones you’re implying. You were my woman, my lover, and I didn’t think of changing the context of our relationship…and I lost you. Then we met again and till yesterday I was struggling to get you to talk to me. I didn’t think beyond getting you back.”
Sarcasm huffed out of her. “You already planned our future liaison, following the same noncommittal pattern of our past one.”
“Because when it comes to you, I’m not the long-term businessman but a beggar who can’t hope enough to plan ahead. I felt I’d be lucky if I even got you to agree to that much. All I knew was that if we got together again, I wanted to be together always. So yes, I would have wanted marriage. Adam just accelerated the process. He’s not the reason I’m proposing, he only gave me the reason to do it now.”
Disbelief still blared from her eyes.
“I can legitimize Adam without marrying you, Lujayn.”