Kept Man: Firsts and Forever Stories

As Kelis’ song “Milkshake” blasted from her phone, Nana started to pump her skinny arms over her head. Ash called, “Slight problem, Nana. You can’t use a song on YouTube without permission from the artist.”

She stopped chair dancing and asked, “Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I am. Have you considered getting someone to record an original song for you?”

She turned off the music, then said, “That’s an idea. My grandson-in-law Zan is a musician, but he and my boy Gianni are on a sailing trip right now and won’t be back until August. Then there’s my great-grandson MJ. He’s fantastic, but he’s at summer camp. Everyone’s always so busy.”

“I know a great musician,” I said. “He’s retired, and he has some time right now. I’m not sure if he’d be willing to do it, but I guess it wouldn’t hurt to ask, right?”

Nana perked up at that. Then she turned to Ash and asked, “What do you think? Is Jasper’s friend any good?”

“He’s phenomenal, actually,” he told her, “but I’m not sure if this is really his kind of thing.”

“Let’s find out.” I took out my phone and sent a text to Micah, which said: Seriously, feel free to say no to this. That little old lady who’s with me in the video I just sent needs a theme song for her YouTube cooking show. You wouldn’t be interested in helping her with that, would you? If I’m overstepping, I apologize.

He replied a moment later with: Is she a friend of yours?

I wrote: Yes. She’s also a huge LGBTQ ally and a pretty awesome human being.

His reply popped up right away: Anything for you, baby. If she’s there with you, let’s video chat.

I sent back a thank you and told my companions, “He’s interested. Hang on, I’m video-calling him now.”

Ash murmured, “I feel another fan-boy moment coming on. It still amazes me that you’ve been spending time with the Micah Mazari.”

Nana asked, “Why does that name sound familiar?”

“Probably because he’s really famous,” Ash told her. “Agreeing to help with your song is a big deal.”

When Micah appeared on the screen, he smiled at me and said, “Hi, baby.”

“Hey. What’re you doing?”

“I should probably lie and say I’m not still in bed.”

I told him, “I’m not judging.”

“Good, then maybe you also won’t judge me for admitting I miss you, even though you’ve only been gone two hours.”

“I miss you, too.”

He chuckled and said, “Liar.”

I put a hand over my heart. “I swear.”

His smile got even brighter. “You’re an angel. You know that?”

I grinned at the screen, and then I remembered I actually had an audience. I flipped the camera around so they were both in the shot and said, “Um, you remember Ash, and I’d like you to meet my friend Mrs. Stana Dombruso. Nana, this is Micah Mazari.”

Ash waved awkwardly and mumbled, “I’m gobsmacked all over again.”

Nana plucked the phone from my hands, then frowned at the screen and asked, “Why is this showing my kitchen?”

Ash tapped the screen to turn the camera around, and Nana said, “That’s better.” She held the phone close to her face and studied Micah before telling him, “I’ve heard of you, but I can’t remember your music. Sing something for me, so I know if you suck or not.”

I was about to protest, but Micah burst out laughing. Then he said, “Yes, ma’am,” and launched into a gorgeous, a cappella version of one of his biggest hits.

Ash and I listened in awe, and when he finished I ran my hand over my forearm and whispered to my friend, “I literally have goosebumps.”

“Same.”

Nana said, “Okay, you’ve got the goods. I’ll let you help me. Now, I made a few notes for what I want in a theme song, they’re in my office.” She hopped off her barstool, and when Ash and I started to follow, she held up her hand and said, “You two wait here, I need to have a meeting with the talent. You know the expression about too many cooks spoiling the broth? I think maybe we’ve got that type of situation.”

Nana bustled out of the kitchen with my phone, and I turned to Ash and asked, “What have we done?”

He chuckled at that. “Those two might be good for each other. Also, how epic would it be if the first song Micah recorded in almost two decades was a jingle for a low-budget cooking show? The internet would explode!”

“I hope she’s not torturing him, though.”

Ash handed me his phone and said, “Ask Micah if he wants us to save him.”

I sent him a text that said: I’m SO sorry. This is Jasper on Ash’s phone, by the way. I didn’t expect Nana to kidnap you. Should we try to distract her?

A minute later, he replied: Nah, she’s adorable. I’ll message you when she finishes with me. Right now, she’s trying to come up with a rhyme for wieners. Let’s hope to god I can talk her into an instrumental theme song.