“No, I—”
“I have nobody to tell me the truth, listen to me, or be my friend. People suck up, but nobody actually gives a shit.”
“But you didn’t like being told ‘no.’ Think about the other night when I didn’t know who you were.”
“But you tried to help me anyway. You told me what to do to fix my problem.”
“Oh, I would have loved to tell you where to go.”
“You mean you would’ve loved to tell me off.”
“Yeah, that too.”
His rumbling laughter made me smile.
“Okay, superstar, lemme get this condom off you, and—”
“Stop. I wanna tell you that I’m not gonna do it anymore.”
“Not do what?”
“What you said before… hurt myself or take chances. Fate doesn’t get to decide for me. I decide for me.”
“That’s a very mature attitude, and I’m glad.”
“Well, it’s all you, calling me on my bullshit.”
“Good,” I said softly as I met his gaze.
His mouth came down over mine, taking me in a mauling kiss that I moaned my way through until I felt hot, thick liquid on my thigh. Tearing my mouth free, I yelled at him, “That’s why you take the condom off and tie it and—”
“A little mess never killed anybody.” He was laughing.
“Ass! This is my bed!”
He lost it then, rolled over on his back, arms and legs flung out, spread eagle, and laughed so hard he started coughing. I tried to smother him with a pillow as I chastised him. He reached out and cradled my face in his hands. “You’re so beautiful.”
“Says the man who just got laid!”
And that was funny all over again.
6
The laundry room was on the first floor, and since I had only one set of sheets, which he found ridiculous, I made him run them down, with quarters and Tide, to wash them.
He wasn’t sure where the detergent went, as he himself had never done his own laundry, so I ended up having to go do that, and he got to unfunk my bedroom.
“What?” He looked confused.
“It reeks of sex in there. Open the windows and use the Febreze.”
He made a face.
“Or you can just leave.”
Operation Clean Air commenced immediately.
Matt called a bit after midnight and said he wasn’t coming home; he was spending the night with some girl he had met at the party. Apparently her roommate was out of town. I told him to have a good time and hung up.
“Got the place to ourselves.” Carson grinned at me after I told him, and I was powerless to not smile back.
As we waited for the sheets to dry, we sat together in the living room, eating peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with Fritos, drinking milk, talking, and watching Animal Planet. People were looking for Bigfoot.
“What’s your plant gonna do again?”
I turned to look at him. “Save the world.”
“And you know how to do this?”
“Not yet.” I chuckled. “That’s why I’m studying to be a botanist and a geneticist and an engineer all in one.”
“I see,” he teased me. “So you’re real smart, then.”
I laughed at him. “Sometimes.”
He tackled me and hugged me so tight I couldn’t breathe. But air was less important than being clutched to his heart.
We danced around my apartment, and he was terrible, looked like he was having a seizure, and that brought on a fit of debilitating laughter that left me bent over and wheezing. The scowl I got just made it start all over again.
“You’re mean,” he told me.
I had to suck in air.
“Really mean.”
But when I leaped at him, I was caught, and having me in his lap seemed to make everything better. All was forgiven.
“So,” he said later, very early in the morning. We were still on the couch, watching Law & Order at that point, snuggled up tight together under a blanket. “I wanna see you.”
“How are you gonna do that?”
“Walk over here.” He squinted at me as if I was dumb, pulling me in tighter against him.
“You can’t do that. Everyone knows I’m gay. If they see me, they’ll know you’re hanging with a gay guy. Do you wanna get drafted? I thought you weren’t gonna hurt yourself or—”
“I like your lips,” he cut me off while rising over me and shoving me down under him.
“Well, I like yours too, but this—Carson!”
The kiss was fun, and I was laughing as I returned it. His hands went right under my sweats to my ass, groping and kneading as he shoved his tongue down my throat.
“I’m sore,” I told him, even though I knew I could easily go again. “You—”
He stopped, frozen over me, his eyes scared, his face worried. “Really?”
“No.” I smiled, reaching for him. “Not really.”
“Oh thank God.” He brightened, resuming his activity, starting with kissing me until I had to pull away to breathe.
“You’re a great kisser,” I told him.
The very satisfied male grunt was his only comment.