Up in Smoke (Hotshots 4)

“Ha. Maybe this is me being sweet to ensure you get more practice in.” Brandt waggled his eyebrows at Shane. He certainly didn’t seem worn out from the sex. And the fact that he wanted a repeat was even more encouraging.

“Hell, I’d give you more practice without the food bribe.” He moved so Brandt could set the tray down. Luckily, he was still in the flannel pants he’d grabbed before the two a.m. baby wakeup. Brandt too had found clothes at some point—cargo shorts and T-shirt advertising the skydiving outfit in Idaho.

“Well, I figured your voice might need something more than coffee this morning after the long gig last night. And somehow a glass of juice for you turned into pancakes before the diva decided she’d had enough of the swing.”

“Well, thank you. And thank you, Jewel.” He smiled at Brandt before dropping his gaze to the baby, who seemed both awake and happy in her sling. “Are you gonna eat too? There’s plenty here.”

“Let me grab a fork and my plate.” Brandt slipped away only to reappear moments later with his own coffee mug and plate. Shane helped him juggle so that he could set Jewel between them on the bed where she kicked her feet and practiced her smiles. This was almost unbearably cozy, both of them sitting up in bed, eating and admiring the baby, who was in an especially cute mood. She was heavier now with big chubby cheeks and plump little fists, which were better at grasping things by the day.

“Wonder how long until she can have some real breakfast?” Brandt asked.

“According to the book, another couple of months.” Of the two of them, Shane had done more baby research, but Brandt was better at winging parenting. And they’d both quickly figured out that babies had their own schedule. She might not be eating, but Jewel was definitely interested in their food, wriggling more purposefully than usual. “Look at this! I think she’s gonna flip.”

“See?” Brandt preened and lightly tickled Jewel. “My kid has talent.”

“She does. You gonna strap her in for a jump before she can walk?” Laughing, Shane bumped his shoulder before gesturing at Brandt’s shirt. Today, the memory of their jump was warm and sunny, not bittersweet, the last few weeks having mellowed him considerably.

“Never. Eighteen. I won’t talk her out of it, but it’s got to be her choice.” Brandt’s eyes popped wide as if Shane had suggested playing in traffic. Him as an overprotective daddy was too cute. “There’s other stuff I want to do with her while she’s little. Silly things...never mind.”

Brandt’s hesitance was also appealing, making Shane grin. “Come on. You can tell me.”

“Okay, but it’s sort of sappy. Like the sort of things kids get to do with their dads. Fairs. Amusement parks. Go-carts. Haunted houses. Fishing. That’s a dad thing, right?”

“Yeah.” Shane’s chest was so tight it was a wonder he could speak at all. And oh how he ached for Brandt’s younger self who hadn’t had much of that. And maybe a little pang for his own upbringing, where there had been adventures, but not a lot of traditional memory-making activities. “You’re gonna be great at this.”

“Thanks.” Brandt met his gaze, eyes more solemn than Shane had seen, like getting it right truly was important to him. And Shane wanted to see that, him taking Jewel places, giving her the gift of a dad who cared enough to put in the time. Right when his heart was almost too full to stand, Brandt’s mouth curved into a slow smile. “I’ve got some pretty good help right now, though. Makes it easier.”

Shane matched his smile, something tender and big and terrifying all at once passing between them. “You’re easy to help.”

The moment was too sweet. He had to look away, turning his attention instead to Jewel, who was still in the center of the king bed, between them. She was still kicking and wriggling, determined expression on her tiny face as she swung from her back onto her belly.

“Oh, wow! She did it!” He turned to Brandt, whose whole body language had brightened, broad grin and proud eyes as he scooped up Jewel and held her high.

“Go, Jewel!”

As Brandt cheered, a song unspooled in Shane’s head, perfect lyrics for a perfect moment. That urge to see the future intensified. He wanted to see these two laughing together for all sorts of milestones. And not simply the big ones either, the ones that an uncle might drop in for like holidays. No, he wanted all the little moments like these too. Everyday miracles.

And even without writing it down yet, he knew this was his best song yet. If he didn’t keep it for himself, this could be one to keep him in gas and food all winter. Winter. Damn. It was barely summer. Where would he be come winter?