He frowned. “You know you do. If you want me to leave, say so.”
She sighed. “Don’t go.”
The truth was, she didn’t want to be alone with her memories right now. And Shane was one of the few people she would have wished for had she been by herself tonight. “Sit down,” she said. “We’ll talk.”
He sat on the same end of the couch his uncle had just vacated. Kelly automatically started to sit beside him, then hesitated and moved toward a chair instead.
“Damn it, get back over here,” he growled crossly. “We can’t talk with you way over there. Stop acting like I’m going to jump you or something.”
Her cheeks warming, she perched on the opposite end of the couch. “Don’t be ridiculous,” she muttered, feeling as irritable as he sounded.
He cleared his throat and spoke in a more amicable tone. “Are you going to meet with your father?”
“I asked Joe to give me some time to think about it. He said he understood, and he thought I should take as much time as I need.”
“Of course Joe understands. He’s been through this himself.”
“I know. He told me a little about it.”
“He obviously likes you. Joe isn’t one to talk about himself much.”
“I like him, too. He’s so...steady.” That was what made him such a good husband and father, she thought. Kelly couldn’t imagine any circumstance that would pull Joe Walker away from his wife and son.
Shane smiled. “That’s a good word for him. Not the first word that would come to mind about his twin, but it describes Joe perf
ectly.”
She was well aware that happy-go-lucky Ryan Walker was as loyal to his wife and sons as his brother was to his family. The Walker twins would never voluntarily abandon their children, she was certain—and neither would Jared. or Nick, or Tony or Joe D’Alessandro, or any of the other admirable men she had come to know through this family. Which made it all the more difficult for her to understand her own father’s actions.
“So are you going to see him?”
She twisted her fingers in her lap. “I don’t know.”
“I’m sure you’re angry with him.”
Frowning, she gave the comment some thought. “I used to be. But now...I don’t know.”
“It’s okay if you are. I know I was mad at my mother.”
Struck by his tone, she turned a bit more to face him. “Are you still?”
“Of course. She didn’t abandon me physically, the way your father did you, but every time she picked up a bottle of booze, she might as well have been in another country for all the attention she paid me.”
“Your father was in the service when you were young, wasn’t he?”
“Yes. The navy.”
“And he was gone a lot, leaving you alone with your mother?”
Shane didn’t seem to like that question. “Dad was on sea duty a lot when I was a kid, but he had to make a living. He tried to get custody of me when he and my mother divorced, but the courts weren’t very progressive about such things then. He sent me letters and gifts and he called when he could, and between tours he spent every free minute with me.”
“I’m not criticizing Jared,” she said quickly, conciliatorily. “You know I’m very fond of him, and I think he’s a wonderful father to you and Molly. I just wondered... well, did you ever get mad at him for not being there more often? For leaving you to be neglected by an alcoholic mother and her husband?”
Shane shook his head. “My dad did the best he could. And when I ran away to find him—when he realized how bad things had gotten for me at home—he got out of the navy to take care of me. He worked his butt off to support me the next few years until he could make arrangements to buy the ranch.”
“So you were never angry at him during those unhappy years?”
“Never,” he assured her, though the answer, at least in her opinion, lacked his usual conviction.