Dirty Beginning (Dirty 0.50)

“No, because Kinsley is my fiancée,” Killian says .

Cedric gasps. Then, he looks to my left hand to find that a ring isn’t there. His eyes narrow in my direction. “You’re engaged ?”

I twist my hair as I look at him. I don’t know how to answer that. I’m not technically engaged. At least, I wasn’t the last time I spoke with either of the men glowering over me, but it’s too complicated to say that I’m not engaged .

Cedric takes my lack of an answer as an answer. “She’s all yours,” he says as he throws his napkin down on the table before storming out .

I don’t bother to follow him with my eyes when he leaves. I feel like crying. I feel like going home and spending the night taking a long warm bath, trying to forget what just happened .

“Come on, Kinsley. We have a table for us set up upstairs. We will have them add another chair. You’ll eat with us,” Granddad says. His voice is dripping with disappointment .

I just nod, unable to say any words without losing it. I feel so embarrassed. I watch as my grandfather begins walking, but Killian hovers over me, waiting for me to follow my grandfather .

I take a second. “How could you?” A tear falls .

“You can’t be with him. He’s not a good guy .”

“And you are?” I shake my head in frustration. “You can’t tell me you want me to make my own decisions about my life and then make every decision for me. You can’t tell him I’m your fiancé one minute but then tell me you don’t want to marry me the next. You can’t pick up a random stranger at a bar one minute and then say I can’t go on a

date myself. Talk about indecisive. What do you want, Killian? Other than the CEO position, what the fuck do you want ?”

I close my eyes when I realize I just cursed in front of a table with children. I never curse. But Killian brings out the worst in me, the absolute worst .

“I want to marry you,” are the words that leave his lips .

I haven’t looked at Killian since we sat down at the table, opposite my grandfather. I can’t. I don’t believe what Killian said when we were alone downstairs. He didn’t say anything else. It was just those five words .

“I want to marry you .”

I don’t believe them. I don’t think I ever will until I see him down on bended knee. And even then, it won’t be because that’s what he really wants. It will be because that is the only way he can become CEO .

“What were you doing with that boy, Kinsley?” my grandfather asks .

Our waiter interrupts us, and my grandfather orders wine for the table. He asks Killian for his opinion but not mine .

When the waiter leaves, Granddad turns his attention back to me, waiting for my answer .

“He was nice. I met him at the shoot earlier. I didn’t realize I wasn’t allowed to date while I waited for Killian to decide if he wanted to marry me or not .”

I feel Killian’s eyes on me, but I still don’t look at him. I’m too pissed to look at him. He did the same thing an hour earlier with a woman. Why can’t I ?

“You know the rules, young lady. The same rules still apply as when your father was alive. If you want to date, you run the guys by me. I will tell you whom you should or shouldn’t date. You’ve made too many horrible decisions in the past to allow anything else. You shouldn’t have been on a date with Cedric .”

“I’ve made one horrible mistake. One,” I say, glaring at my grandfather for bringing it up .

My eyes dart to Killian, but he doesn’t seem to know what mistake we are talking about .

I move on. “What was wrong with Cedric? He seemed like a perfect gentleman if you asked me .”

“Tell her, Killian .”

Killian takes a deep breath. “Cedric is a scam artist. He only dates rich women and then scams them or steals money from them .”

I turn to him. “And how exactly do you know this ?”

“We do background checks on all our employees, including the models. There were some suspicious things when his returned. The suspicious information didn’t touch my desk until after the shoot. Otherwise, I would never have let him do the shoot. He’s a wanted felon in three states. We called the police. He was arrested as soon as he left the premises .”

Fuck! How the hell am I supposed to make my own decisions in my life when I keep making the wrong ones ?