Dirty Beginning (Dirty 0.50)

But, right now, he’s not my grandfather. He’s the enemy .

He calms his face before walking over to stand in front of me. He places both hands on either side of my shoulders. “This is what your father wanted, princess. He wanted you to marry Killian. He wanted you to support Killian in the role of running the company. He wanted you to have children to pass this company along to—just as my father did, just as I did to your father, just as your father is doing to you .”

I feel a tear slip out of my eye. “But that’s not what my father is doing. That’s not what you are doing. I’m not getting the company with the same conditions as you got the company with or the same conditions as my father got. I’m being forced to marry someone, and only then do I get any say in the company. I’m not getting the same terms .”

He smiles, like he thinks he’s got me now, like he thinks he’s won. “See? That’s where you are wrong, Kinsley. You are getting the same terms as everyone else in the family. We all had marriages that were arranged by our parents. We all had marriages that were for the betterment of the company .”

I frown as his words sink in. His words can’t be true .

“That’s not true. Mom and Dad met in college their junior year .”

He shakes his head. “No. Your mother was the daughter of the chairman of the Nevada Gaming Commission. We were having some trouble with getting our newest casino approved. Your father fixed the problem, proving his loyalty to the company and to this family above everything else .”

My mouth drops. I had no idea. I always thought my parents were in love. I always thought they cared about each other but maybe not. That might be why my father spent so many nights alone in his casinos instead of at home with my mother. That can’t be true though. My mother was devastated when Dad died. She still is .

“You’re lying .”

He shakes his head. “Ask your mother .”

I plan on it. “It doesn’t change anything. I still won’t marry Killian .”

“You’re stubborn, just like your father. He eventually caved though. You will, too.” He glances at his watch. “You need to go home and get ready. I had a dress sent to your hotel room. I don’t know why you stay here when you have a beautiful room at home.” He sighs. “Be ready at eight tonight. That’s when Killian will be picking you up .”

I shake my head. “I’m not marrying him .”

“Maybe not. But he at least deserves the respect of you telling him to his face .”

I nod. “I’ll go .”

He’s right. I need to put an end to whatever this is that’s going on between Killian and me. I turn to leave, but his words stop me .

“There’s one more thing you should know before you make a decision. If you refuse to marry Killian, the money is gone. I control the trust your father left you. You will have nothing but a theater degree to find you work. I’ll call everyone and tell them never to hire you as a model again. You are doing this, or you are no longer my granddaughter. If you walk away from this, you are no longer a Felton .”

Those are the words that will haunt me for the rest of the day. They are the words that will haunt me for the rest of my life .

“You are no longer a Felton .”

I wish they were true. I wish I were never born a Felton .

I’d thought my future was completely out of my control. I was wrong .

My grandfather just gave me control. I just don’t like my choices .

I don’t wear the cream-colored dress lying on my bed when I get back to my hotel room. It’s a beautiful dress, one that I’m sure my grandfather spared no expense to get for me. But I’m not wearing it. I don’t know if it’s because he chose it or if it’s because it’s an act of defiance to wear anything but that dress. It’s possibly my last act of defiance. I don’t know if it’s because I can’t stand to wear any color that resembles a wedding gown. I don’t know if it’s because I had a beautiful red dress that I love and haven’t had an occasion to wear it to. Whatever the reason, I chose red .

I chose this red ballgown. I don’t know what it means. I’m no closer to deciding if I’m going to say yes or no when Killian asks me. And I know he’ll ask me. That’s what tonight is about. That’s why I’m wearing this pretty dress. That’s why I’ve spent hours fixing my long blonde hair. That’s why I’ve spent hours covering my face in makeup .

Tonight is the night I decide the rest of my life. I just don’t know what future that will be .

I hear the knock on the door. I glance at my phone. It’s eight on the dot. Killian’s on time tonight. I peek through the hole in the door and see him dressed in a tux. I take a deep breath, and then I open the door .

I watch him lick his lips as his eyes travel over my body. I hold my breath, trying to calm my beating heart, but it doesn’t slow. His eyes catch mine, and it’s not a look of lust peering back at me although a hint of that is still there. It’s a look I’ve never seen come from his eyes, and I have no idea what it means .

For a second, I imagine that this is how it feels when you are in love, and you know tonight is the night—the night your life will change forever, the night he will get down on a nervous knee and ask you to marry him .

If only I could find someone who would do this for real …

If only he were doing this for more than a promotion …