No question, willing to fight—to cut down—anyone who might get in his way. And somehow, I’d become the woman who wanted to stand with him through all of that.
Tessa reached out and wiped a tear that streaked down my face. “It’s the ones we’re afraid of that end up meaning the most.”
A heavy breath escaped my lungs, the words firm because I wasn’t going to start deluding myself. “I’m pretty sure he doesn’t want a life with me, Tessa.”
I doubted the man even knew how. He had one focus, and he didn’t know how to look outside of that. But last night…last night it’d felt as if maybe he could. As if maybe both of us could look outside ourselves, beyond what we thought we were destined for, and find each other.
Collide in the middle.
Her smile was soft. “Of course, he doesn’t think he would want that. I have no doubt he’s afraid of you, too. Of what you could mean.”
My heart shivered and shook, as fiercely as my head. “I let him touch me, knowing he was going to break me in the end.”
I could already feel it, trembling around me, the coming devastation.
Her lips thinned. “You let him touch you because you were taking a chance, Eden. Opening yourself up. Stepping out in your belief. He’d be a fool not to do the same for you. And considering his kid is like the smartest five-year-old I’ve ever met, this guy has to have something going for him.”
Playfully, she grinned.
I managed an awkward giggle. “Well, he has a couple things going for him.”
Her eyes widened with glee. “Oh, and I hope one of those things is a really big dick.”
She singsonged it.
I choked over the laugh that sputtered from my mouth. “I hate you.”
“No, you don’t…you love me. Like…mad love. Mad, mad love.” She gushed it as she wrapped her arms around me and pulled me to her chest. Her voice dropped. “Crazy, mad love, Eden. The kind you’re going to find, whether it’s with Trent or someone else. You aren’t done yet. I won’t let you be.”
My chest squeezed. Adoration thick. “I do love you, Tessa. Mad, mad love.”
I felt her grin against my head, and then she jumped back when the bell buzzed through the speakers. “Oh crap. We’re late.”
She spun around and jerked open the door, trying to hide her laughter when two fifth-grade teachers jumped in surprise with us bursting through, Tessa still towing me behind her. She let go of her laughter the second we busted through the lounge doors and out into the corridor.
“That was close,” she tossed out from the side, her hand still snug on mine, pulling me along and looking behind her as if we’d just gotten away with a jewelry heist.
“Just a warning, if my daddy needs to talk to me today, I’m blaming you and sending you in my place.”
“Pssh…” She waved me off. “Bring it on. That man adores me.”
Gratitude filled me as I squeezed her hand. My wild friend who always stood for me. Went to bat for me. Cared for me, no matter what.
“Of course, he does. How could he not?”
She gave a tight squeeze. “Back at you, baby,” she whispered right before we parted. Tessa went right down the intersecting hall and I went left. “Hope you have a great day, BFF,” she shouted out ahead, her voice fading the farther she went.
“Oh,” she hollered over her shoulder, slowing me. She had a glint in her eyes when I looked back. “Don’t think just because we got sidetracked you’re going to get off with not telling me about that cake. I want all the details. Just how yummy it was and how much you ate.”
I hate you, I mouthed.
She formed her hands into a heart, making it pound. Her smile turned into this massive, ridiculous grin.
A giggle slipped free, and I gave her a tiny finger wave before I turned on my heel and rushed in the direction of my classroom. One of the aides who’d been watching my students on the playground had them in a line and was leading them inside the room.
I followed right behind.
The clatter of children laughing and excited for their day filled my heart with joy. With a chaotic peace.
I’d always thought their little faces were the promise of something better. That they were the hope of this world when it felt like everything might fall apart.
But it was one little face that melted a crater through the middle of me. One that made my feet falter and my heart swell to overflowing. His giant backpack bounced all over his back as he came bounding for me through the classroom. “Miss Murphy, Miss Murphy!”
Gage had his arm in the air, waving his hand over his head, his precious smile dimpling his chubby cheeks and his caramel eyes dancing with his joy. “Look it, Miss Murphy. I made something for you! You wanna see? You wanna see?”