Sideways Stories from Wayside School (Wayside School 1)

“She was the meanest teacher we ever had,” said Rondi.

“What happened to her?” asked Mrs. Jewls.

“Louis ate her,” said Jason.

“Well, I’m not going to allow this,” said Mrs. Jewls. “Get out of my classroom!” she demanded.

“It’s Halloween, sweet teacher,” said Mrs. Gorf. “Ghosts can go anywhere they like. I’ve come for a little class reunion.”

“But it isn’t Halloween,” said Mrs. Jewls. “Halloween is still two days away.”

“I know,” said Mrs. Gorf, “but Halloween falls on a Sunday this year, so we are celebrating it on the Friday before.”

Stephen leaped up from his seat. “See, I was right,” he said. “Today is the day we celebrate it, the Friday before! Mrs. Gorf proved it.”

He ran up to Mrs. Gorf. “They all laughed at me and made me feel stupid because I was the only one who got dressed up. But they were the ones who were wrong. You and I are right.”

He put his arms around Mrs. Gorf and hugged her.

Mrs. Gorf gasped and disappeared.

The lights came back on.

Mrs. Jewls picked up the piece of chalk from the floor. She wrote on the blackboard, “Two plus two equals four.”

“That’s good,” she said. “When two plus two doesn’t equal four, anything can happen.”

All the children who had laughed at Stephen now called him a hero. But they told him to change out of his stupid costume.

So at lunch, Stephen went home, washed up, and changed. He came back wearing blue jeans and a polo shirt. Of course, his hair was still green. It always was.

? Sideways Stories from Wayside School ?

30

Louis

Louis had a red face and a mustache of many colors. He was the yard teacher at Wayside School. It was his job to see that the children didn’t have too much fun during lunch and recess.

And if you haven’t already guessed, he is the one who wrote this book.

On June tenth there was a blizzard. Louis was afraid that the children would have too much fun, so nobody was allowed outside.

“Class,” said Mrs. Jewls. “After you finish your lunch today, come back up to the classroom. You are not allowed outside.”

The children all went to the lunchroom. Miss Mush had made Tuna Surprise. They looked at it, then hurried back up the stairs.

There was nothing to do.

“Now, class,” said Mrs. Jewls, “I know that you are all bored, but I have a special surprise for you.”

“I hope it’s better than the Tuna Surprise,” said Maurecia.

Mrs. Jewls continued, “Louis is going to come up and entertain us. He will tell us a story. Now I want you all to be on your best behavior.”

When Louis walked in, all the children booed.

“Are you going to tell us a story?” asked Bebe.