“I do, mom. I really do.”
“Okay.” She was trying to be strong, but in that one word I knew she needed me.
“I’ll make the arrangement and let you know when I’ll be there.” I was already pulling my bag out from the corner of the room where I’d tossed it when I arrived home the other day.
“I’ll see you later.”
“It’ll be late mom. Go to bed. I’ll let myself in and I’ll see you in the morning.”
I hung up and immediately dialed Jude and told him what was up. Thank god for good friends.
“Go take care of your mom, Cyrus, for as long as you need. We’ve got it covered,” he’d said, even after I’d been such an asshole the day before.
“I hate to leave it all—”
“Hey, you covered for me when I was out with April and Bertie. It’s no big deal. What’s important is that you go help your mom.”
“Thanks, man.”
“Of course.”
Unfortunately, the soonest flight I could get from Bismarck to Chicago wasn’t until five the next morning. I let my mom know and then did my best to get some sleep.
The flight was uneventful and I was able to rent a car and get home by mid-morning. I burst through the door and hugged my mother. She wept and my heart broke. I couldn’t lose this woman. I was a bad-ass SEAL, but all that strength and fortitude was no match against cancer. I felt helpless.
I sat her down and got her tea. “Tell me the next steps.”
She sniffed. “I have an appointment today for…” she shook her head. “I don’t know what for. I wasn’t paying good attention.”
I took her hand. “I’ll take you. We’ll do this together.”
She gave me a sad stare. “You can’t leave your life for me.”
“I’m not mom. Let’s just take this one step at a time, okay?”
“Yes, okay.”
That afternoon I took her to the clinic and this time sat with her as the doctor went over the various treatment options and what he recommended.
We were both in a bit of a daze as we headed out of his office after making her next appointments to start treatment.
“Cy?”
I stopped at the woman’s voice and turned. “Lora.” There were many times I’d imagined running into her and how that would be. But with my mother being sick, all that pain and anger I imagined I might feel never manifested. Mostly, I felt nothing.
She approached me tentatively and I realized she was going to give me a hug. We’d been close for a long time, so it made sense that she’d hug me. At the same time, she’d dumped my ass so it didn’t make sense. Still, I let her hug me.
“It’s good to see you. You look good,” she said.
She did too. Her long blonde hair was pulled back into a ponytail. I used to like to tug the band from and wrap the long strands around my hand as I fucked her. She wore her usual scrubs as an oncology nurse, which wasn’t the sexiest outfit, but back when she and I were together and sometimes role-played nurse and patient, seeing her scrubs often gave me a hardon. Not this time though.
“Thanks, you do too.”
She looked from me to my mother. “Mrs. Blake.” Understanding came over her face. “You’re a patient?”
“I am,” my mother said, her voice wobbly. “Leukemia.”
Lora’s sympathetic expression was since