“Really?” My mom’s brows furrowed. “She’s so pretty and fit.”
She was. But she didn’t have the sweet, caring green eyes that Petal had. Or her curves. God dammit why was Petal always lingering in my subconscious?
“She’s smart and kind too mom, but she just doesn’t do it for me anymore. I’ve moved on.”
“Does she know that? I sort of got the idea that she’d be interested in rekindling things with you.”
“She knows. I’ve told her.” Clearly, Lora didn’t tell my mom I was seeing anyone else as I’d suggested to her. Was I seeing someone else? Was a friend with benefits considered seeing someone? If Petal was going on dates with other men, did that make it okay for me to date too? Except I didn’t want to date. I didn’t want Lora. I just wanted Petal. Jesus, I was fucked.
“I know you think I’m meddling, Cyrus, but I worry about what will happen if I don’t survive. I don’t want to leave you alone.”
I took her hand. “When you’re feeling better, I’ll bring you to Bismarck and you can meet Jude and his family. You’ll see I have people around me. In fact, I was thinking maybe you could move there. I can get you a nice place—”
“Leave Chicago?” Her eyes turned sad. “My home? This home? I raised you here, Cy.”
“I know mom.” Deciding now wasn’t the time to bring up moving, I changed the subject. “Can I get you more oatmeal? Maybe some tea?”
She studied me for a moment. “No.”
I checked my watch. My flight was leaving later that afternoon to return to Bismarck.
“I wish you could stay longer,” she said.
“I do too mom. But I’ll be back the week of Thanksgiving. I’ve ordered food so all we have to do is gorge ourselves. And Lora says you’ll be off the treatment cycle then.”
“I want to bake a pie,” she said, with fierceness in her eyes. To her, baking a pie was a big fuck you to cancer.
“I’ll help.”
She smiled. “I love you, Cy. You’re my biggest pride and joy.”
Even as a grown ass man, it always stroked the inner child’s ego to hear her talk like that. I wanted to be a good son. I knew I wasn’t always the best. After all, I was living in North Dakota when I should be here. I was sleeping with my best friend and plotting to murder any other man that touched her. Clearly, I wasn’t as good of a man I could be.
I flew back to Bismarck and considered seeing Petal, but I was still not sure how to feel about her still wanting to date other men. So I went home, worked out, and went to bed.
On Monday, I was in the office first thing. Midmorning, Jude popped his head in.
“How was your mom?”
“Cancer treatment is brutal, but she’s fighting,” I said, sitting back in my chair to stretch.
“I know you’re planning to go home for Thanksgiving, but I wanted to let you know again that if you’re here, you can come by. We have lots of room. Petal will be there. So will Conner”
Conner too? Would he hit on Petal? Would she respond?
I pushed that out of my mind. “Thanks. I’m taking the week off. I ordered dinner although my mom wants to make a pie.”
“Good for her.” He stepped inside. “Listen, about Petal.”
Oh fuck.
“She’s apparently set up an online dating profile. I don’t blame her for wanting to get out into the world. She’s at that bakery twenty-four-seven, but you never know about meeting people online.”
It took a herculean effort to keep my face impassive.
“Do you think I’d be crossing the line if I dug into the men she was talking to?” Jude asked.
Yes. Why hadn’t I thought of that myself. “What does April say?”