I heard a moan. “Oh hell. Mom!” I scanned the living room but didn’t see her. I rushed back to her bedroom; she wasn’t there either.
“Cy!” Lora called.
I rushed out to the kitchen. My mom was on the floor.
“Jesus, mom.” I dropped down next to her, holding her hand. I wanted to cradle her, but I wasn’t sure what was wrong with her and I didn’t want to make it worse by moving her.
“Cy?” she said, her voice held a distance.
“I’ll call 9-1-1,” Lora said.
“What happened? Did you fall?”
My mom grabbed my hand, but didn’t say anything.
“Mom! Mom! Talk to me.”
Ten minutes later, she was loaded into an ambulance. I followed it with Lora to the hospital and then started the long vigil of pacing as we waited to find out what was wrong.
“I should have never left her.” What had I been thinking?
“You can’t blame yourself, Cy. She’d hate that,” Lora said.
“I should have been there. Jesus, what happened?” I strode to the doors behind which doctors were working on my mother. “What’s taking so long?”
Lora rubbed my back. “They’re running tests to figure out what happened. It takes time. Let’s get some water.”
“I don’t want water. I want to know what the fuck happened to my mom.”
“You will, Cy. Just let them make their diagnosis and treat her.”
I scraped my hands over my face wishing to hell that Petal was here. I don’t know what she’d have done, but I still could have used her here.
“Come on. They’re doing everything they can and when they have something to tell us, they’ll let us know.” Lora nudged me away from the doors.
I let her lead me back to the wait
ing area. I sat down, but immediately rose and paced. I had too much pent up anxiety to simply sit.
It felt like forever before a doctor came out.
“Mr. Blake?”
“I’m Mr. Blake,” I said, rushing to him.
“Your mom is resting now. She fainted. Nothing is broken and she doesn’t have a concussion, but she is anemic and dehydrated, which is why she fainted.”
“What? We’ve been taking care of her.” I looked at Lora wondering if my trust in her was misplaced. Then again, I’d been home and taking care of her meals.
“It’s not uncommon in leukemia patients. She may have a loss of appetite from her treatments. You’ll want to be diligent in making sure she’s eating and drinking enough.” He went on to provide more things I could do to make sure my mom was getting adequate nutrition.
“Can she come home?” I asked.
He nodded. “We’re going to keep her a little bit longer, but yes, you’ll be able to take her home in a bit.”
“Can I see her?”
The doctor smiled, but I wasn’t feeling very assured. “Yes. I’m sure she’d like to see you and your wife.”