“No.” She frowned and leaned forward.
“Am I distracted?”
She shrugged. “Maybe a little. Sometimes.”
I swallowed back tears, cursing the hormones making me emotional.
“For example, I don’t have the agenda or report for the public works meeting. You usually have that to me by now.”
“You’ll have to talk to Brooke.” I sat back, feeling completely defeated.
“What?”
“The mayor gave her the job. And to rub it in my face that he’d handed over another one of my duties without telling me, she came to ask me to check her work. Bitch.”
Sinclair flinched. “I’m sure there was a good reason.”
I glared at her. “Yes, he’s handing my job to his new infatuation. Why can’t you see this? Sinclair, he doesn’t tell me anything anymore. When he makes appointments. What work he’s handing off…nothing. I’m invisible to him.”
She gave a nod. “That is wrong. I’ll talk to him about that. But as good as you are, there’s no doubt we needed more help, and let’s face it, the public works agenda and report isn’t something you need to be doing.”
My heart fell. “I’m having a baby. I can’t be slowly weaned out of a job.”
“No one is doing that.”
Was I really crazy? “So why can’t anyone talk to me about what work I might want to pass off? About what work I want to keep? About what I feel I can handle? I know I’m just a lowly secretary, but until that woman came in, I at least felt respected and appreciated.” Maybe I needed to consider that job with Stark after all. I didn’t much want to work for an asshole, but it felt like that was what I was doing now anyway. At least with Stark, I’d probably earn more.
“I’m sorry you feel like that and you’re right, you should be consulted or informed. I’ll talk to the mayor.”
“You’re patronizing me.” I felt completely deflated.
“I’m not.”
“You’re a stronger woman than me, Sinclair. When you became a single mom, you could do it. Plus, you had more people in your life. There’s only me—”
“And Ryder.” Her eyes narrowed.
I let out a breath. “A baby needs more than a fun playmate for a father.”
“You know, Trina, you’re my best and oldest friend, but I’m having a really hard time with the way you talk about Ryder. He’s going to be a great dad.”
There was something about her tone that suggested she was adding that I wouldn’t be a good mom.
I nodded. Maybe it was too much to ask for her support. It hurt, because I’d been there for her when she learned she was pregnant. I helped as much as I could with getting her life organized so she could finish school and raise a baby. I’d babysat a lot when she was at her study group. And even more recently when Wyatt came back, I’d been there as she navigated her relationship with him. Hell, if I hadn’t suggested their fake marriage to save the farmers in Salvation, they might not be living in happily wedded bliss right now.
But I also knew blood was thicker than water. Of course, she’d be on Ryder’s side. I needed to accept that. There was a part of me that wanted to tell her all that, and yet, it felt like it would be a waste of time. Plus, I didn’t have the energy.
I stood. “Sorry I bothered you.”
“Trina, don’t be a martyr.”
Anger boiled up inside me. “I wasn’t, but now that you mention it, I remember being there for you when you were scared shitless about being pregnant—”
“I was eighteen.”
I couldn’t stop the tears. “Right. I’m too old to be scared.” I turned away, feeling utterly alone.
“Trina, wait.”