I arched a brow at her because I didn’t believe her.
She huffed out a breath. “I second guessed you and that was wrong. I feel so horrible about it.”
I realized that until I did give her a sign that I’d forgive her, she’d be needing to convince me she felt bad. “I understand,” I said. “You’re not the first and won’t be the last to think what you did.”
I moved to sit down.
“Why did you sleep with me?”
I closed my eyes because that was definitely a discussion I didn’t want to have. Finally, I faced her. “I told you.” I’d fucking opened myself to her and she shit all over me.
She swallowed. “I’d have probably said yes.”
Now I was lost. “About what?”
“If you’d asked me to ride off with you that first day you gave me a ride on your bike, I might have said yes.”
That felt like a million years ago.
“I’d probably still say yes. It scares me, but I’d say yes.”
At first, I was offended that she was scared, but I realized I’d been scared too. “Well, we knew it would blow up in our faces.”
She shook her head. “You thought that.”
“And I was right. I should have never touched you. I should have just left everything as it was.”
She wiped a tear and I wondered why that comment hurt her so much. “I should have trusted you. Not just with Chen’s accusations, but when you touched me. When you told me you liked me. If I had—”
“Maybe it’s best that we don’t go there.”
“I can’t stop. All I can think about is how I hurt you, and how if I’d put more faith in us maybe we could see where things went. I messed that up and if I knew how to fix it I would. Can I fix it, Noah? What would it take?”
I could feel my heart softening in my chest. It started when she said she’d have gone with me if I’d asked her. She would still go with
me.
“Why?”
Her fists clenched in frustration. “I told you why. Just because I messed up royally doesn’t mean I don’t want you.”
“I think it does. How can you want me if you’d think I’d betray my family? If you think I’m a slacker living off my inheritance. I doubt that opinion has changed.”
She covered her mouth as if she was trying to stop a cry. “In Hong Kong I saw a smart businessman. You wielded power and authority. And I don’t know what you do with your projects, but I’d like to know. And if me or your family has made you feel dismissed or unvalued, I know we’d all like to fix that.”
“You want to give me what I need?”
“Yes.”
“I don’t want anyone to give me anything. The entire world thinks I’ve been given everything. For once I’d like to earn my respect, not just get it from being Margaret Strong’s grandson.”
She stopped short and I realized I’d said too much.
“Is that why you don’t want to work for the company? Because you think she’s giving you the job to keep you out of trouble?”
I went to the kitchenette area and found the tiny little liquor bottles. I grabbed a couple, not caring what they were.
“Oh Noah. Do you really think Margaret would hand her company over to anyone, even you, if she didn’t think you could do it?”