Holding On To Heaven (Allendale Four 2)

Dropped her off.

Hayden-Is she pissed? I swear I didn’t do anything.

She’s upset—wants to talk.

Oliver-about wughat?

Jackson-wtf?

Oliver—about WHAT. SHUT UP. I’m DUNK.

My room. Tomorrow. She’ll be there and we’ll talk

Hayden-Ok

Jackson-Yep

Oliver-ahoairneugougha

I shook my head and shoved my phone in my pocket.

There was no way I was tipping them off about what Heaven was upset about. No fucking way. They’d lose their minds and want to come up with a plan, which is what got us in the dog house in the first place.

Heaven was right, I thought, climbing the steps to my dorm. We’d made a decision without her. To protect her, because even though she was a strong, amazing woman, she had to work through some tough shit over the last year. Heaven tried to hide the darkness that bothered her, but I knew it lingered—so did the others. The only thing we had control over was how we treated her. How we protected her and kept her safe. None of us wanted her to ever—ever—feel like she was just a body to us, an outlet.

Not like Spencer. Or Mark, or those other douchebags in high school that thought they could use and take advantage of her.

I walked in my room, tossing my keys and phone on the desk with a clatter.

We loved her. Cherished her, and she always needed to know that, which was why there was a line we’d drawn—one we were hesitant to cross. After all we were guys, teenagers, filled with hormones and sex-fueled desires. God, in my fantasies I’d done nearly every imaginable thing possible to her body. But that wasn’t how you treated the woman you loved.

Was it?

Was I holding back? I thought, glancing at myself in the mirror hung on my door. I stripped off my shirt and jeans, getting an eyeful of the hard-earned muscles that lined my body.

Hell yes, I was holding back. Because if I crossed that line, the one between love and lust, the one where you let your animal desires take over, where did it stop? How did you stop?

And that’s why we made the line, to keep that basic instinct in check. And now Heaven wanted to cross it.

I got in the bed and turned off the light, staring at the blank, dark ceiling. I knew one thing for certain: Heaven would get her way with us. She always did.

I just hoped it didn’t open a can of worms we couldn’t shut.

7

My phone rang on the way to Anderson’s dorm.

“Hi, Mom,” I said, lifting the phone to my ear.

“Hey sweetie, how are you today?”

“Pretty good.” I didn’t think she wanted to hear about how nervous I was about talking to the guys in a few minutes.

“How are classes?”

“They don’t fully start back until this week, but I got everything I wanted even though my Monday, Wednesday, Friday biology class is at eight-thirty in the morning.”

“You’ll survive.”