The water was warm against my skin, the soothing scent of lavender in the air. Even warmer were Noah’s arms around me, holding me close. He whispered words to me constantly. He assured me he was there and not leaving my side. That we would figure this out together. That I was not alone. Every sentence was designed to calm and ease me. And it worked.
“You’re seeing my doctor in the morning,” he told me quietly. “He fit you in.”
“All right,” I agreed.
“I won’t leave your side. Not for one moment, okay?”
“Okay.”
In the sanctity of his embrace, I was calmer. Even though the day’s events played out in my head and the thought of the new projects Martin had placed on my desk was still there, I didn’t feel the overwhelming panic about them. Between the tea, the lavender, and Noah, I was calmer.
After the bath, Noah slipped one of his T-shirts over my head and tucked me into his bed, crawling in beside me and holding me close. “Sleep, baby. I have you,” he murmured.
Safe, warm, beyond exhausted, and feeling protected, I did.
Chapter Seventeen
Dani
Dr. Clark smiled kindly at me across the desk. “Okay, Dani, I’ve got everything I need for today. So, I’m going to lay it on the table, all right?”
My grip on Noah’s hand tightened. He’d been with me the entire time, including in the examination room. I had nothing to hide from him and he was able to give Dr. Clark details I couldn’t remember, so I asked him to stay with me. I could hear the anxiety in his voice as he talked about my attacks, and I ached, knowing I was the reason for his worry.
“Do you have your HR information? A phone number and a name I can contact?”
“Yes—why?”
“I’m putting you on medical leave—effective immediately.”
“For how long?”
“We’ll start with six weeks. I’ll assess you every week, and we’ll discuss your future in a month.”
“Six weeks?” I gasped. “Martin will fire me!”
My heart began to race, thinking of the emails and texts I would get. The constant phone calls—his cold voice on the other end of the phone, demanding my return. My grip on Noah’s hand tightened, and he shifted closer, putting his arm around me.
Dr. Clark shook his head. “Legally, Dani, once his HR department receives this letter, he cannot contact you without your permission. And even then, he is not allowed to discuss business. He can inquire as to your general health, discuss the weather, or rising gas prices, but nothing about work.”
“He won’t like that. He’ll just fire me as soon as I return.”
“Legally, he can’t. If and when you return, your job is secure.”
“What am I supposed to do?”
Dr. Clark exchanged a look with Noah, then leaned forward, lacing his fingers together. “Dani,” he stated in a gentle voice. “You are about as close to a breakdown as you can be. Your body is sending you all sorts of signals, which you’re ignoring. You need to step back, rest, and forget about work for a while. I’m going to put you on some medication that will help, and if you’re willing, schedule you an appointment to talk to someone.”
I blinked at him. Step back…rest…talk?
“I couldn’t just cut back at work?”
He snorted. “No, I really don’t think you can.” He tapped the file in front of him. “Your blood pressure is high, your heart rate is bad, you shake constantly, and I can tell you’re not eating or drinking enough. Your skin is dehydrated, you have circles under your eyes, and your fingers and feet haven’t stopped moving since you got here,” Dr. Clark stated firmly. “And that’s without any test results. I am certain your blood work will show your electrolytes are off and heaven knows what else. Should I continue?”
I shook my head, dazed. “You sound as if I could die from this.”
His brow furrowed. “Even an ingrown toenail can be fatal if not treated. You need to do this in order to get well, Dani. If you don’t stop this right now, your body can indeed fail.”
Beside me, Noah made a strange noise. I looked over, meeting his intense, anxious gaze. “Listen to him, baby. Please.”
The pain those few words were saturated in shocked me. His pleading words from last night rang in my head. “I can’t lose you. Not now—not ever.”
I wasn’t only hurting myself. I was hurting Noah. I’d do anything to erase those lines of worry from his face.
“Okay,” I whispered. “Okay. I’ll do it.”
Noah lifted my hand, pressing a kiss to the palm. “Thank God.”
Dr. Clark smiled. “Good. This is step one, Dani. I’ll be beside you all the way. So, I think, will someone else.”
“Every step,” Noah insisted.
“I thought it was over. That how I was feeling had just been a blip,” I admitted.