The awkwardness had returned after dinner was finished and there’d been a point while we were cleaning up the dishes that I’d caught Seth looking at the kitchen island almost longingly, as if remembering what we’d done against it just one short week ago, but the moment had passed quickly when he’d realized I was watching him. He’d made an excuse about needing to catch up on some work and I’d gone up to my room to take a shower and call Mav to see how Daisy was settling in. Just before ten o’clock, Seth had knocked on my door. His pale skin had flushed with color when he spied my belt draped over the same chair he’d taken it from the night we’d made love for the first time and it had taken everything in me not to drag him to me at that point. With a mumbled explanation that he was heading to bed, he’d handed me the book he’d been holding and told me I should check it out if I was interested and then he was gone. The book was the first one in the series he’d talked so excitedly about at dinner and I’d ended up cracking it open a few minutes later and finally forced myself to put it down just before two in the morning when I could no longer keep my eyes open. My grumpiness as I’d stumbled into the kitchen a few hours later was met with a wide, knowing smile and a declaration that there was no time for coffee and Seth didn’t have any travel mugs.
“Hey,” Seth said again and then he briefly nudged my arm where it was resting on the armrest with his elbow. “First cup is on me.” I felt my heart constrict painfully in my chest at the sight of his smile but I managed a nod. Seth was taking this friends thing to heart but all I wanted to do was to tell him to turn the car around and take us home so I could get him beneath me again.
“You told the vet you were going to New York,” I managed to say in a desperate effort to distract myself from my thoughts.
“Um, yeah. Stan…that’s my dad’s business partner, well, my business partner now – he set up a meeting with another shipping firm that’s interested in buying our company.”
“You’re selling?” I asked in surprise. “I thought you wanted to run the business.”
Seth shrugged his shoulders. “I do but Stan convinced me to hear them out – he says they’re offering a lot and Dad’s company has been struggling since he…”
I waited quietly as Seth pulled himself together. As much as I would have liked to take his hand in mine, it wasn’t an option.
“This company is the industry leader and Stan says they’ll make sure no one loses their jobs. That was always real important to my dad…he thought of the people who worked for him as family, you know?”
Seth glanced at me and I nodded. I’d never met more kind-hearted people than Fred and Corrine Nichols. They’d welcomed me with open arms from the second Trace and I had walked in the door and I’d been overwhelmed that not only would I not be judged for my sexual orientation despite their own son being gay, but that they weren’t looking down on me for being from humbler roots than Trace. Yes, I had achieved a certain level of success in my career but I was a blue collar guy through and through, despite my attempts to appear otherwise.
“Yeah, I know,” I said reassuringly. “You’ll do what’s best for the company, Seth. Everyone knows that.”
The words seemed to soothe Seth because he visibly relaxed before continuing. “I’m thinking about seeing if they might be interested in a partnership instead. They have a really strong presence in Europe and the Middle East but our company has had more success with the Asian and South American markets.”
I listened as Seth explained the intricacies of the business and I couldn’t help but admire how much he knew for his young age and limited hands-on experience. I’d known Seth was smart but I was realizing it was another thing I’d underestimated about him. And he’d clearly inherited his father’s passion and work ethic, something Trace had never managed to pick up. From the time he was a kid, all Trace had ever wanted was to join the military. And while he’d been intensely devoted to it and, more often than not, it had been his sole focus, he’d consistently struggled to commit himself to anything beyond the life he’d built for himself. It was the reason he’d left Seth in the care of their grandmother rather than leave the military to take care of Seth himself – because he couldn’t see himself in any other role…not wouldn’t, couldn’t. I’d struggled with Trace’s selfish choice but as I’d thought back to my own father, I’d realized that in some strange way, maybe Trace’s decision had been the right one. I’d figured maybe it had been better that Seth hadn’t had to suffer his brother’s resentment.