"Well see you then. "
Tully hung up the phone and shrieked. "That was KLUE-TV. They want to hire me!"
"Oh, my gosh," Kate said, jumping up and down. "Youre going to be a star. I knew it. I cant wait to—" She stopped in the middle of her sentence; her smile fell.
"What?"
"Chad. "
Tully felt something twist deep inside her. She wanted to pretend there was something to think about, a decision to be made, but she knew the truth, and so did Kate.
"Youre going to be a huge star," Kate said firmly. "Hell understand. "
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Kate pretended to focus all of her attention on driving Tullys car, but it wasnt easy. Ever since shed picked her up from the interview, Tully hadnt stopped talking, spinning out the old little-girl dreams. Were on our way, Kate. As soon as I get an anchor spot, Ill make sure they hire you as a reporter.
Kate knew she should put the brakes—finally—on this dual future of theirs. She was tired of following Tully, and besides, she didnt want to quit her job. She had a reason, finally, to stay where she was.
Johnny.
How pathetic was that? He didnt love her, but she couldnt help thinking that maybe with Tully gone, shed have a chance.
It was ridiculous, and embarrassing, but her dreams centered more on him and less on broadcasting. Not that she could admit that to anyone. Twenty-five-year-old college-educated women were expected to dream of more money and higher positions on the corporate ladder and running the very companies that had refused to hire their mothers. Husbands were to be avoided in the pre-thirty years. There was always time for marriage and children; was the common refrain. You couldnt give up you for them.
But what if you wanted them more than you wanted a singular, powerful you? No one ever talked about that. Kate knew that Tully would laugh at such thoughts, say Kate was stuck in the fifties. Even her mother would say she was wrong and bring up that weighted word: regret. Shed parrot the words that filled the pages of Ms. magazine—that being just a mother was a waste of talent. Her mother wouldnt even notice how sad she looked as she spoke, as if the life shed chosen had been for nothing.
"Hey, you missed the turn. "
"Oh. Sorry. " Kate turned at the next block and circled back, pulling up in front of Chads house. "Ill wait here. Ive got The Talisman to finish. "
Tully didnt open her door. "Hell understand why I cant marry him yet. He knows how much this means to me. "
"He certainly knows," Kate agreed.
"Wish me luck. "
"Dont I always?"
Tully got out and walked up to the front door.
Kate opened her paperback and dove into the story. It wasnt until much later that she looked up, noticing it had begun to rain.
Tully should have come back by now, told her to drive on home, that shed be spending the night with Chad. Kate closed the book and got out of the car. As she walked up the cement path, she had a bad feeling that something was wrong.
She knocked twice, then opened the door.
Tully was in an empty living room, kneeling in front of the fireplace, crying.
Tully handed her a piece of paper that was splotched with tears. "Read it. "
Kate sat back on her heels and looked down at the bold black handwriting.
Dear Tully,
I was the one who recommended you to KLUE, so I know all about the job youve come to tell me about, and Im proud of you, baby. I knew you could do it.
When I took the job at Vanderbilt I knew what it meant for us. I hoped . . . but I knew.