He spread the soft cheeks of her ass apart, admiring the view. The bud of her asshole, her lips open for him. Every part of you. He felt his hands clench, and he forced them to relax. He shut his eyes and let himself go, lost himself in the tight squeeze of her pussy, drowning in the helpless sounds she made. Her orgasm clamped down around his cock, and he froze, crying out hoarsely as he emptied himself inside her, as he gave it all to her. Every part of me.
He panted over her back, shuddering at the clenching aftershocks. With regret, he withdrew from her body and helped her up. He pulled her down onto the couch, cradling her body with his own while she caught her breath.
“I didn’t hurt you, did I? Didn’t go too far?”
She sounded drugged. “Let’s do it like that every time.”
His lips curved into a smile in the moments before sleep dragged him under.
Chapter Twelve
Erin
Erin set her chin on Blake’s chest, enjoying the coarse male hairs that tickled her and the fresh soap-musk scent of him. At some point since dinner, he had gently woken her. They’d stumbled into the bathroom before crashing into bed, together again.
It was time, though. Time to broach the subject that could end this. End her.
“You nervous?” she asked, referring to his upcoming teaching stint in the vaguest way possible.
He kept his eyes closed, but the restless shift of his limbs gave him away. “Why? Should I be?”
No, but she was. She believed he’d be amazing as a professor, and whatever happened with her class, she would deal. But this teaching job was his first step in the direction of living again. She wouldn’t take that away from him. Wouldn’t even risk it with her presence.
“You don’t have to go through with it. If you don’t want to.”
He opened his eyes then. His expression was guarded. “No one will know we’re together,” he said flatly. “You don’t have to worry that people would judge you for…”
Her stomach clenched. For sleeping with him, because he had scars on his face.
She turned into his chest so he wouldn’t see the flash of emotion that caught her off guard. Her heart broke a little every time he put himself down like that. And yet he had valid reasons to believe the world would care about how he looked…because the world did care. Because his fiancée had broken up with him, because his parents had mourned him as if he had died instead of lived. Because his entire career following his father’s footsteps as a senator had detonated before it even began. The world cared, and she wouldn’t lie to him.
“You know I’m not ashamed of you.” Her voice was muffled. It would be better to look him in the eye as she said it, but he might misread the sympathy there as pity. He’d already had his pride stripped from him. She’d never take what he had left.
“I’m a bad choice for you in every way, Erin, but damned if I’m going to leave you alone.”
She looked up again, feeling a sad smile touch her face. “I have to tell you something. I’m not going to graduate this semester.”
His face darkened. “What the hell are you talking about?”
When he looked angry, the mangled skin stayed frozen while the other side of his face lowered. A strange effect but an apt analogy, because part of him was frozen in that place of pain and grief while the rest of him struggled to move on.
She stroked his temple—the smooth one, because the other would just make him self-conscious. “It’s just not the right time. One more semester won’t kill me.”
He reined in his surprise. “Okay, explain it to me. What’s not right about this time?”
“I won’t have enough for tuition, for one thing. I usually do the installment plan, but I can’t count on having enough. The hours at my new job aren’t very regular.”
He was silent a moment. Even when he spoke, his voice was deceptively quiet. “We’ve talked about this. I want to help you.”
“You want to give me money for sex…and I refuse.”
“Then come back to work for me.”
“That would still be you giving me money. No.”
“You cleaned my house before we started anything. It’s not like the employment is contingent on you sleeping with me. I’ve never given you any trouble, have I? Never complained about your work.”
“That’s exactly it. Would you complain if you needed to, knowing that it would interfere with our relationship?”