Deep 6 (Multiple Love)

Racing up the stairs, I root around for clean sheets and pillow covers in the hallway closet. Heavy footsteps sound on the stairs, and Andrew comes into view. "What's going on, man?"

"Sandy's gonna stay in my room. I'm taking the couch."

"Yeah. I got that part. I mean, what's going on with you guys?"

Shrugging, I force an even expression onto my face, relaxing my clenched jaw and lowered brows. "Nothing. I mean, I'm just helping out while her car is in the shop."

"Yeah? Just helping out?"

"Just come out and say what you mean," I bark.

Andrew leans against the wall, his hand sliding into his pocket as though he's trying to make himself appear relaxed and easygoing. "This is Sandy." He emphasizes her name, and my stomach clenches.

"Yeah."

"This is you and Sandy," he repeats, even though I got his meaning the first time.

"I know, man. What do you want me to do?"

Andrew cocks his head, and his ice-blue eyes fix on mine. With his pale blond hair and tan skin, he looks like a Disney prince just waiting for his princess. A prince with lots of tattoos. "I want you to be careful, okay. You're in a good place. This…we've all worked for this. I don't want you risking the progress you made, okay?"

"I'm good. You don't have to worry about me."

Andrew shakes his head. "We're brothers from another mother," he says. "I'll always worry about you, the same way I worry about Arden and Able and Greg and Damien. This is who we are. We've got each other's backs, no matter what."

"I know," I say. "And I've got yours."

"So, just listen when I tell you to be careful."

My fist balls the soft fabric of the bedcovers in my palm. "Sometimes it's impossible to be careful, Andrew. Sometimes, your heart rests in someone else's hands even though you don't want it to."

"I get it," he says. "Sandy…she's special."

"Special?"

"The whole package. Pretty, smart, a good person, funny…don't forget you've told us all about her, and now we get to see her in the flesh."

"And you agree?" I ask.

"She's just about perfect," Andrew says, and although a sliver of jealousy runs through me, it's also a big relief. These guys are important to me, and so is Sandy. If they could like each other, it would mean a lot.

"She is."

"But she's going to leave," Andrew says softly, and the pain I feel at those words is seismic. I turn away, heading to my room, pushing away the truth in his words, as though if I ignore him, it won't be the case. He follows me, lingering in the doorway.

"She doesn't have to," I tell him.

"Are you ready to open up to her? Are you ready to tell her what happened?"

I shake my head, using the distraction of pulling the covers from my pillows to avoid looking at him. "Until you can be honest about that, she won't understand, and she won't be able to forgive."

His words freeze me. "I know," I say softly. "Even if she knew, it doesn't automatically mean she'd be able to forgive me or to trust me again."

"Nothing you ever told me about her would make me believe she'd hold a grudge like that."

"But forgiving someone and trusting them again are two very different things. Sometimes, the trust part is impossible."

"If I thought you were ready…" Andrew trails off, and I know what he's trying to say. It's my boys that pulled me back from the darkness. They don't want me to slip into that place again, and I don't want to go there either. My throat burns, and any more of this conversation is just going to make it worse. I need to change the subject.

"The wedding was good," I tell him. "Sandy's friend Connie married four guys. They're all brothers."

"Four guys?"

When I turn to Andrew, his face is a picture. "Yeah. Four. They already have a kid together."

"Imagine growing up with four dads," Andrew says, shaking his head.

"It'd be better than growing up without," I say. When he nods, I know it's coming from a deep place of understanding. Every man in this house knows what it's like to need a father and be disappointed.

"Very true."

"There were two other groups like that at the wedding too. Connie's best friend Natalie is with three dudes, and another girl, Melanie, is with five."

"Is it catching?" Andrew jokes. "I mean, how do people even get into that situation?"

"I guess it starts with the men. There has got to be a lot of love and trust there to want to share a woman."

"And a woman who can divide herself between multiple men."

"That's just it. I watched these groups while Sandy was dancing. They work as a team. Better than any true couple I ever saw."

Andrew nods, his hand moving to his chin. He rubs at his day's growth of stubble. "I can see how it could simplify things. Like, have you ever thought about what it will be like in this house if we all had girlfriends?"