"What are we going to do?" Able asks me as we're bent over an engine, trying to work out where the oil is leaking from.
"Fuck knows," I say.
"One of us should go find her. Bring her back," he says.
"We don't know where she's gone," I say. "Tyler trusted her to go and come back. He wasn't planning on having to drag her back."
"I don't think that planning is one of Tyler's strongest characteristics," Able mutters. "Anyway, finding someone is easy. She's a teacher, right? A simple Google search will find her school district."
"That's not exactly narrowing it down, is it?"
"Well, it's better than nothing." He sighs, rubbing his jaw. "Wanna help me start to search?"
"I don't know," I say. "If she wanted us, she would have called. She wouldn't have driven off into the sunset without a backward glance. Even if we find her, what can we say that will change her mind. We did our best to show her how good life could be. We know she's open to the idea of a group relationship because it's her friends who are already living that way. Don't they say 'If you want someone, set them free?’"
"Yeah, they do, but this doesn't feel like we've set her free. We've let her go. There's a difference."
"You're speaking like we had a choice. We couldn't keep her at our house against her will. That shit would be kidnapping."
"I know that." Able rolls his eyes. "That's not what I'm suggesting. I guess I just wonder if we'd talked more about what we wanted. If we'd shown her more of how it could be if we were all together at the same time…"
"You think a gang bang would have solved things?" I laugh.
"Don't make it into something disgusting," Able says softly. "I mean, if we'd worshipped her the way she deserves at the very center of our group, and showed her that we are a real group, not just a house of individuals, then maybe she would have understood the possibilities more."
"Is that how this shit works?" I ask, straightening up and wiping my hands on a rag. This conversation needs focus, and I can't think when my head is close to an engine.
"I did some reading on polyamory. It depends. Some people keep the sex separate…you know…have different nights for different people. Others do everything together. I think those are the ones with more of a chance of success. There's less opportunity for jealousy or feeling left out."
I shake my head, pursing my lips. "I've never fucked in front of anyone before."
"There's nothing to it," Able says. "So long as you trust all the people involved. It's actually fucking sexy to watch and then be able to join in."
"Is that how it was with you and Arden?"
"Yeah. It was mind-blowing."
"Shit." I lean against the car, folding my arms as I realize that Able isn't talking shit. Maybe we did go wrong in keeping things so separate. We were trying not to scare Sandy, but with hindsight, she really doesn't seem like the kind of woman who'd scare easily. Her friends are already living this life, and I know what women are like. They share a lot of information about sex, especially when it's good.
"I think we should find her. We need to at least try to bring her back," Able says.
"Okay. I'll help you try."
Later, Tyler and Arden drive the cars to race. Arden has a hard-on to win tonight, and so does Tyler. The problem is that Arden's eyes are alert, and Tyler looks dead. There are purple smudges beneath his eyes which tell me he hasn't been sleeping. No one should race if they're not one hundred percent engaged.
"He's fucked," I whisper to Greg.
"I know," Greg says, crossing his arm and shaking his head as Tyler slumps low over the steering wheel. "As soon as I saw that girl, I knew this was coming."
"You think Sandy's trouble?"
He shakes his head, his jaw ticking as he grits his teeth. "She's not trouble. She's what he needs. She's what we all need. Except Tyler's too messed up to be with anyone, let alone someone who was in his life before Jake."
"He feels like he's fucked things up twice," I say.
Behind us, some douchebags crank up their music loud. Hardcore rap isn't my thing, but it fits with the atmosphere tonight. I'm already wound tight, and the music just makes the tension in my spine worse.
I know what would make everything better. Pushing my cock inside Sandy's sweet pussy. Spilling my seed inside her and watching her come apart with pleasure. I swear her body was made for mine. Soft in all the places that I'm hard. Curvy in the places I'm tapered.
Why doesn't she see that?
"Tyler's up," Greg says, stepping forward and leaning closer to the car.