My eyelashes fluttered a few times, frantically trying to blink away the tears that Rachel’s words had brought to my eyes.
I nodded, trying to swallow the lump in my throat. “You’re right, Rach. Thank you.”
“Well, you know I can never hear enough of you telling me I’m right.” She paused, giggling. “I’m glad I came for lunch today.”
I smiled at her. “Me too.”
“Now get back to work before I take you out on a shopping spree!” She laughed.
26
Holly
After the conversation with Rachel, which had been less like lunch and more like a therapy session—although the fettuccine was delicious—I found my mind clear enough to get through the rest of my workload and finished early enough to get home before the sun went down. I made dinner and took it out onto the back deck with Hunter to watch the sunset from the balcony.
The sun was just dipping down beneath the line of palm trees when gargling, underwater sounds chirped from the speaker of my phone. I lunged for it, nearly toppling my wine glass in the process, and lit up like a Chinese lantern on the Fourth of July when I saw the incoming call was from Jack. I’d been dying to talk to him ever since the conversation with Rachel and answered right away. “Hey! I’m so glad you called.”
I stared at the phone while the fuzzy image became sharper and sucked in a startled breath at the intense look in Jack’s eyes when his camera finally came into focus. My heart lurched and I immediately wondered if my entire conversation with Rachel was about to be made a moot point. Was he going to break up with me?
He gave me a strained smile. “Hey, I’m glad I caught you.”
“Me too.” I smoothed the palm of my free hand over my jeans, wicking away the sweat. “Is everything okay?”
Jack’s eyes flicked off screen and I couldn’t quite tell if he was looking at someone or something else or if he just couldn’t bear to make eye contact with me before dropping whatever bomb he was holding onto. “Jack?”
“Sorry. My roommate was ducking back in to grab his book. I kinda kicked him out so that we can get a chance to talk without interruption.”
“Oh,” I replied, my voice dull and flat. The hand holding the phone was starting to shake.
“Listen, about earlier,” Jack began, bringing his eyes back to the screen.
I held my breath, silently pleading with him to give us more time.
He sighed. “I just want you to know that I’m sorry for bringing the mood down like that. I’ve had a lot on my mind since this cruise started, and I’ve basically been in back-to-back meetings every day, and whenever I’m not thinking about work, I’m thinking about you and our time together in Holiday Cove. I wish I was back there again. With you. This is the first mission I’ve ever been on since I signed up that I wasn’t a hundred percent invested in. I feel like I’m not present and with what we’re about to get into—I have to be one hundred percent focused.”
Hot, bitter tears swam in my eyes as my mind filled in the blanks of what he was saying. It was over. He’d all but called our relationship a distraction to his life threatening mission overseas. I was about to interject, to let him know I understood, that it was okay, and that we could try to be friends. All of the clichéd break-up platitudes. But before I could get out the first word, Jack continued, “Holly, do you remember the promise I asked you to make on our last night together?”
I nodded, still unable to speak.
He smiled and the tightness in my chest released slightly. “Good. I want us both to hold onto that for the next few months. I’ve been so busy worrying that I’m losing you and that I can’t be there for you in the way I want to be—I lost sight of that promise. I know this is hard and it’s probably a lot harder than you thought. It’s certainly harder than I’d expected it to be. But I have to know that you’ll be there when I get back and that we’ll wait until then to make any big decisions about the next step. It won’t be like this forever.”
The breath I’d been holding escaped in a relieved rush of air. I locked my eyes with Jack’s. “God, you scared me!”
“I did?”
“I thought you were about to say you didn’t want to do this anymore. I thought you were breaking up with me,” I confessed, still smiling with the relief of knowing I’d been wrong. “Listen, Jack, I don’t know how much time you have but there’s something I want to tell you.”
“I’m all yours, ” he replied, his voice shivering over my body, leaving trails of heat and desire over my skin.