All the Sauce (IceCats 4)

“Is it hard to find clothes your size? Is that why you only wear sweats?”

Before I could cuss his ass out, Owen called to make sure I got home all right. I wanted to tell him what Leroy said, but I knew that would be such a bad idea. Owen would go toe-to-toe with Leroy, and he’d catch a charge, and then it’d be my fault. I just wish it would all go away. I wish I hadn’t left the dorms. I wish I had a house on the beach that didn’t have fat-phobic people in it.

I wish I hadn’t said anything to London.

She hasn’t spoken much to me all week, and I don’t know what to do about it. I don’t know how to tell her that I feel betrayed by her. I feel like she doesn’t have my back or even care about my feelings. I really thought she was a good friend, but she’s so in love with Leroy, she can’t even consider that he is a fat-phobic asshat and won’t tell him to go fuck himself. I mean, that’s what I’d do if the guy I was dating ever spoke to anyone I cared about the way Leroy speaks to me.

But like my mom says, “Not everyone was raised the way you were.”

That’s the least of my issues right now. I’m unsure if letting Owen in was a good idea. I knew from the jump that he was trouble. I’ve always known that. It’s the main reason, along with his cockiness, that I stayed away. I knew he had the ability to make me feel things I was never ready to feel. Though the difference is, back then, I thought he couldn’t live up to my standards.

Now, I’m terrified I don’t live up to his.

The pressure to make sure I’m everything he thinks I am is so frustrating. Like, I know I don’t need to do anything more than I am doing. He likes me, I like him, but it’s all going so well that it has to go to shit. It just has to. Daily, I can’t believe he texts me. He works out every morning for games, and he still comes to work out with me in the evening. I feel like I should do my hair or give him a blow job, but even though I don’t, he still shows up. Unfortunately, my mind won’t allow me to accept it for what it is. Instead, I ask myself, does he still like me? Does he still think I’m attractive? Shit, I took too long to text; he’ll be pissed.

But he never is.

For the first week of our relationship, if that’s even what we’re calling this, I’m overthinking the shit out of it, and it’s stressing me out. Not that I would ever tell him this. He would get on to my case and reassure me like the sweet guy he is. Oh my God, did I just think Owen Adler is a sweet guy?

I did.

He is.

Wow. This is all so crazy.

I walk along my plant area, misting and cleaning leaves as I speak lovingly to them. “I’m looking for another home for us. Don’t freak out. It’s okay. We’re all going to be great. We just need to grow somewhere else.”

When my phone rings on my bed, I jump in surprise. I glance at my clock by my bed, and it’s late-late. I walk over to my bed, worried, to find it’s Owen on FaceTime. My lips curve up first, but then I fix my hair, making sure I don’t look like something that belongs under a bridge. When I answer, I look as if I’m scared, and I instantly feel stupid.

He, of course, looks dreamy and so damn gorgeous. He’s lying on white sheets, freshly showered. “Hey.”

“Hey,” I draw out, unsure how to act. Do I look okay? Nope, still look like something that lives under a bridge. “It’s late. Aren’t you tired?”

He nods. “Yeah, but I wanted to call and see that gorgeous face before I go to bed. It was a rough game.”

“Oh, that stinks. I thought with you scoring, it wouldn’t be as bad.”

“I did. I hate losing,” he says with a grin. “So, you watched?”

“Only for you,” I say, and his grin grows. “Detroit was playing hard.”

“I know. I took a fucking blade in the mouth.”

“Ouch. You still have teeth?”

He flashes me his pearly whites. “Sure do.”

“Good. I like your smile.”

“I like yours too. Makes me all gooey inside.”

I snort. “Gooey? You freak.”

He laughs, turning onto his side. “So, how was your day?”

“Busy,” I say, going back to my plants. “Lots of classes today. But thankfully, it was just a data and filing day at work, so I got out early and then worked out before coming home.”

“Cool. How’s school?”