Goody Two Shoes (Invertary 2)

“Hey, I was watching that!”

“As thrilling as that show must have been, it’s time to quit watching TV. It’s time to step up and behave like a man.”

Darkness swept over his father’s face. “Watch what you’re saying, son.” It was a low, rumbling warning.

Josh didn’t care. “I’m done with this. You look like a hobo and you smell worse. You’re making everyone miserable and you’re screwing up your life. It has to end.”

“Or what?”

Josh felt a muscle in his jaw throb. “You don’t want to know what.”

“Are you threatening me?”

“If that’s what it takes.”

His father threw up his hands, making empty chip bags flutter to the floor. “This has nothing to do with you.”

“I’m your son and I’m fed up watching you screw up your marriage, blaming everyone except yourself. You need to sort this out.”

His father surged to his feet with a roar. “How? How can I sort this? You’re so bloody brilliant, you tell me.”

Josh resisted the urge to negotiate with his fists. He had to remind himself this was his father.

“Suck it up and be what Mom wants. That’s how. You were that guy once. You can do it again. Let go of whatever is making you a mean-tempered son of a bitch and show the woman you love her.”

His father stepped into Josh’s space. His nose inches from Josh’s. Fury emanated from him.

“I can’t be the man she wants me to be. That man is gone. All that’s left is an old man. I’ve always been too old for her, but now there’s no hiding it.” His face went purple. “I’ve been waiting for this day to come. The day when she decided she was too young for me and went off to find another man.”

Josh took a step back. “Is this what this is about?” Josh shook his head. “Mom isn’t looking for another man.”

“She spent eight hours on the flight over here chatting up a guy in his forties. I saw it. Flirting like I didn’t exist. It was just a matter of time.”

“If that’s what you think, why don’t you stop fighting her on the divorce and cut her loose.”

“Because I love her!” The bellow was so loud it made the photo frames on the wall shake.

Life seemed to seep from his father, and he sagged back onto the couch.

“I can’t be the man I once was. I’m sixty-seven, son. I’ll never be that man. Your mum is only fifty-five and she looks years younger. She deserves better. She deserves someone who won’t keel over and die at any minute. I should let her go. I know that. It’s all I think about. I tried. I moved out of our bedroom in the hopes it would be easier to let her go. I saw the writing on the wall years ago. The day I woke up sixty and your mum was still in her forties, I knew the end was coming. I looked at her then, full of life, barely middle-aged and married to an old retired man.” He looked up at Josh, his eyes glassy. “I thought with some distance I could let her go, but I can’t. I can’t let her go and I can’t be what she needs, either.”

The anger evaporated from Josh as he slumped into an armchair. “Mom doesn’t want a younger man. She wants you. She doesn’t care how old you are. She loves you.”

“We don’t want the same things anymore.”

“No, you’ve convinced yourself that you don’t want the same things anymore. Somewhere along the way you’ve talked yourself into thinking that you’re old and you can’t do the things you want to do. It’s a load of crap.” Josh rubbed a hand over his face. “You guys should never have sold up the business and retired. You haven’t done any of the things you said you’d do when you weren’t working. All you’ve done is sit in the house and wait for the end. I should never have bought you the place in Florida.”

His dad smiled sadly. “We thought it was what we wanted. House on a golf course, days in the sun. It was the dream.”

“Obviously it was the wrong dream.”

They sat in silence for a while. Each of them deep in thought.

“Mom loves you, Dad,” Josh said at last. “She doesn’t want someone else, she wants you. You need to stop acting like you’re at death’s door and live life with her. You might be in your sixties, but you’re healthy and fit. You don’t look half bad, either. Give her a chance. She’ll compromise. She doesn’t care what you do as long as you do something together. You’ve got to listen to me on this. I know it’s the truth.”

His dad gave a faltering smile. “How come you know so much about women?”

“I learned at the feet of the best.” His dad’s eyes shot up. Josh barked out a laugh. “Not you. Hell, really not you. I’m talking about Sinatra, Dean Martin, Harry Connick, Jr., Sammy Davis…”