Twist of Fate (Kings of Chaos 6)

She holds up a red rectangular box. “Okay, I’ve heard of chocolate-covered crickets, but worms?” She wrinkles her nose, and I chuckle.

“This is the first time I’ve seen you be super girly.”

“Well as the only girl, I’m not squeamish about too much.”

“Feeling like a game of truth or dare?” I ask.

“My candy love only extends so far.”

I grab a few boxes of crickets. “I’m sending this to my brother. He’ll get a kick out of them.”

“Who says boys ever really grow up?”

“What? You didn’t want to follow Peter Pan to Neverland at some point?” I ask.

She rolls her eyes. “No, because there were no lost girls. I thought of being Tiger Lily a time or two. I definitely played a game of pretend with Ellis and Casp.”

“I’m glad you talked things out with him.”

“I am, too. Family is important. Our talk the other day reminded me of that. I hadn’t realized the resentment I was holding on to was eating away at our bond. I had it in my head that he had a perfect life. I was so wrong.”

“We get used to believing the imagery everyone works so hard to portray.”

“Sad that things have become that way. We’re all empty on the inside with pretty exteriors.”

“That’s why fitting in is the biggest lie there is. That’s one of the few things I’m grateful my father taught me.”

We browse through Tinsel Town and Route 66 where they feature older candies. She selects a few for her parents, and I try to imagine her upbringing. What would it be like to have the two loving parents? It’s a rarity in the club. Like finding a unicorn. After an extended stay in the Marshmallow Room, we head to the Chocolate Lab.

“You’re going to spoil me if you keep this up,” she says as we wait for our chocolate bars to be wrapped.

“What? Feeding you candy?” I lift an eyebrow.

“Being such a good boyfriend. You get me. I haven’t allowed myself to be understood in a long time.”

“Good. That means you’ll remain by my side where you belong.”

I wish I was half the man she thinks I am. It’d make everything a hell of a lot easier. How am I ever going to let you go? I admire her open face. There’s no pretense. There’s a purity in that. An innocence I lost long before I understood how priceless and fleeting it was.

“What are you thinking about?”

How much I don’t want to lose you. “How different life here in L.A. is proving to be.”

“Is that a good thing or a bad one?”

It’s a question I can’t answer for myself.

“Anything with you is good, Xi.” You have to find a way to make her stay, the desperate voice inside of me demands. Bind her to you. Make her need you enough to stay. I’m a master manipulator. It’s part of my charm and upbringing, but I can’t bring myself to use any of those skills on Xia. Having her means making hard choices I’m not sure I’m ready for. Leaving K.O.C., or bringing her into the life. Both choices come with huge risks and a high chance of failure.

If I was naïve, I could see her running a truck for K.O.C. I can’t introduce her when I don’t know how I feel about the club. It’s a hard life with big demands. It’s the only life I’ve known, and it’s nearly torn my soul to shreds. Like that’s the worst thing I have to tell her. The day is suddenly marred by the black mark on my past. I continue to go through the emotions as my chest gets tight. It’s like being a former Death Eater and never telling your spouse. Jesus, she has me referencing Harry Potter. I have to tell her. And I will … soon. I won’t jeopardize her future now by distracting her at such an important time in her life. She needs backup.

Later, after the contest, I’ll come clean completely. If I can get Stone’s permission. The web of deceit is getting stickier by the second.

***

“I didn’t think this could get any tastier, but you’re proving me wrong.” I drizzle the melted milk chocolate around her breasts and down the valley between them. Bending down, I lap at the path I created. “So sweet, inside and out.”

“I-I thought I was the one with the sweet tooth,” she says shakily.