“You think he can keep me away from my woman and my child?”
“We’re none of those things.” Ruthie jerks away from me.
I release her to keep her from hurting herself. “You’re what I say you are.”
“Fuck you! No tattoo, no commitment. I’m not your Old Lady. Any judge worth his grain of salt will make sure I get full custody. Then I’ll be your baby mama on the weekends, if that.”
“You keep throwing those threats around and see where it gets you,” I retort.
“Anywhere is fine as long as it’s not with you,” she spits the words at me.
“I need you to listen to me.”
“No, all your words hurt.”
“The truth hurt. Living hurts.”
“No, Tritt, just you.”
“There are things you need to know.”
She closes her eyes and exhales. Her shoulders slump and her face pales.
I grip her shoulders. “Ruthie?”
“Not tonight. Please.”
“If not tonight, when?”
She shakes her head and drops against me. If eyes are the windows to the soul, hers are exhausted. She’s carrying my child. It’s no longer about me or her, but the little one growing inside her belly. I palm the back of her head and bring her to me. She rests her head over my heart and stills. I can feel her heart galloping like a horse in her chest. Her breathing is shallow, and her color remains questionable. Back off. “Let me say what I need to right now and I’ll go. For tonight.”
“You’re going to do what you want anyway, Skull,” she whispers.
“What I said had nothing to do with you and everything to do with an illness that runs in my family.”
She looks up at me stunned.
I nod. “I would’ve never done this before explaining it all to you. That’s why I said no, okay?”
“You want the baby?”
I bow my head, unable to continue to hold her gaze. “I’ll take care of you and him or her when they come. You’re not in this alone.”
“That’s not what I asked you.” Her voice wavers.
You don’t know what I do. “Are you going to be okay now with Blue?” I ask.
She nods. “Yes.”
“Are you going to ignore me tomorrow when I come back?”
“No, but that doesn’t mean anything has changed. I meant what I said.”
“Then I guess we have a problem, cause so did I.”
Blue releases a heavy sigh. “Everyone back to your corners. You don’t need to figure it all out in one night. The kid won’t be here for another eight months and some change. We all need to calm down, regroup and come back at it fresh.”
“Agreed. Are you going to stay with her?” I ask Blue.