Pretty Hurts (Left 1.50)

“What? No. You wore them before.”

“I know. I still haven’t come out at work.”

“Who says you need to?” Liv says.

“Wasn’t that what going bald was for?” I shake my head. It’s harder than I thought it would be. I’m surrounded by people obsessed with looks. I worry about their response, though I wish I didn’t.

“No, that was for you to feel empowered. Whether you come out in the open with it or not is up to you. Don’t beat yourself up because you’re still processing what’s happening.”

I sigh. “Logically, I know what you’re saying is true, but mentally it’s hard to accept.”

“I get it. But I’m always here to help reinforce the truth and pull you outside of your bubble. The same way you do for me.”

“That’s what besties are for,” I say, feeling better for talking out the things on my mind. I take another sip and peer at her over the rim of the cup. “On another front, you’d be proud of me. I went out the other night after work.”

“Oh. With Angela?” she inquires, mentioning one of the make-up artists I often team up with for bigger events.

“No, with Edgar. My barber.”

“Houston’s friend?”

“Yes, have you met him?”

“A few times. He’s a really nice guy, but I thought he was in a long-term relationship with someone. Sh

e had an M name. Mariah? Maryanne? No.” Liv snaps her fingers. “Marilyn, that’s it.”

“They broke up some time ago apparently. But this was just a friend thing. The guy he had lined up to go had to bail when he got called out of town for work. He offered, and I knew I needed to get out of the house, so I said yes. We went to the Alamo Draft house. They were showing one of those old, cheesy horror movies and had a Q&A with the cast afterward. It was so much fun.”

“You do love your gory horror films.” Liv shudders. “I’m shocked you said yes. You’re usually slow to warm to people.”

“I have to admit, I feel a real connection with him. I think because he walked me through that first haircut, and he knows about my Alopecia and doesn’t treat me any different. Plus, you know him. He’s so laid back, funny, and interesting.”

“You got all that between a couple of haircuts and one night out?”

I shrug as heat creeps up into my face.

“Holy crap, you’re feeling him, aren’t you?”

“What? No.” I shake my head.

“Oh, bull, it’s written all over your lying face,” Liv says with exasperation.

I give a half laugh. “No. I could easily be into him, and that scares me. I mean, I’m a wreck. The last thing I need to do is get involved with someone right now.”

“Are you kidding me? You are so picky. If he’s registered on your radar, that’s huge.”

“I know, but the timing …”

Liv waves her hand. “Look at who you’re talking to. Do you remember the train wreck my life has been for the past year?”

I protest, “That’s different.”

“Why?” Liv challenges me. When she crosses her arms beneath her breasts, I know I’m in for it.

“Because there were outside sources.”

Reaching across the table, Liv grabs my hand. “So is this. Don’t let the bad in your life prevent you from seeing the good. Maybe he’s not the one. But what if he is? Don’t rule anything out.”