What the Heart Knows

Oliver nodded.

“I told her my wife passed in an accident, and I wasn’t ready to go into details about her accident just yet, which she accepted. She had a close brush with death herself, so she understands it’s not an easy topic to speak about in depth.”

“It sounds like she’s the right woman at the right time.”

“I’d like to think so,” he said. There were moments with Juni when he felt like he was exactly where he was supposed to be. It was jarring how connected he felt to her at times. It challenged his beliefs. He’d never been on for mystic or overly spiritual things before, but now he wasn’t so sure he felt the same way.

“I’m glad, Oli. I was starting to get worried about you. It was like Hannah had some crazy hold on you that no one would ever break.” Her words made the hair on the back of his neck stand on end, and he noticed Tanya shiver. Though neither of them said it out loud, he knew he’d been teetering ridiculously close to the edge for a while.

“So, how serious are things between you two?”

“We’re not picking out China patterns or anything, but I think we’ve arrived at the meet the family stage.”

“Wow.”

Her words were hushed as she turned to look at him.

“Yeah, it took me by surprise as well.”

“You know I’m always behind you, Oli. I’d love to meet her, whenever you’re ready.”

“I was hoping you’d say that,” he said. “I was thinking maybe we could meet up for lunch one day next week?”

“Just tell me when and where.”

Oliver nodded as his heart lightened. Once he’d made the decision to leave the past behind him, things had become easier in some ways and harder in others. It was almost like the universe aspired to torture him just a while longer.

“Thanks, T. I’ll let you know soon. For now, can we keep things between the two of us?”

“Of course.” She paused. “I’m happy for you. It’s past time you got back to the business of living.”

Oliver wanted to believe things would happen easily for him from now on. So why did this feel like the calm before the storm? When things seemed too good to be true, they usually were. Don’t be so pessimistic. He gave himself a mental shake and offered up a smile for his sister.

“I know. I guess we all grieve at our own pace though.”

“Hannah would be happy to see you moving on.”

Maybe the real one, but the twisted version I see in my dream has made her feelings quite clear. His happiness waned as a vision of Hannah from his dreams surfaced.

Her once golden skin was pale. The lustrous, thick, light brown hair he loved to run his fingers through now hung limp and greasy around her gaunt face.

“Hannah?” he asked. He could barley recognize the woman he once knew. Her athletic frame had withered down to a skeletal one. The bones protruded at angles so awkward he winced.

“How quickly you forget, Oliver.”

“I haven’t forgotten you, Hannah … you don’t look like yourself.”

“Yeah, death will do that to you.”

“I don’t understand.” He’d dreamt of Hannah before, but she’d never looked or acted like this.

“It takes a lot of effort to look pretty for you when I visit, and after the way you’ve chosen to ignore me lately I figured it wasn’t worth the expense of energy.” He felt the bottom drop out of his stomach as she moved toward him. The black maxi-dress she wore dragged along the ground and belled out behind her like a trail of inky darkness? His teeth chattered as the temperature plunged and a cloud of white appeared in front of him. “After everything I’ve done to stay with you, all it took was one flash of big brown eyes and I was a thing of the past.”

“It’s not—”

“We both know it’s your fault I’m here, Oliver, and for that reason, I refuse to give you up so easily.” A wicked smile lined her lips and his entire body tensed as she leaned forward to place her face inches from his own.

“Maybe you need a reminder of what it was like down there.”