The Senior (College Years 4)

His intensity actually…scares me. And I’ve never thought that about Eli before.

Ever.

Out on the field earlier, before the game started, I couldn’t stop staring at him. At first, he didn’t even bother looking in my direction. Just stared straight ahead, his expression like stone. His jaw hard and his eyes glittering with an unfamiliar emotion. The longer I stared at his handsome face, the more I ached to go to him. Though one thing did stop me.

The anger in his expression. In his stance.

More than anything, he looked pissed. Super pissed.

Probably at me.

Hayden grimaces. “Probably?”

My answer is immediate.

“Then no.”

“Oh come on, Ava! We haven’t seen you in months,” Gracie says, leaning forward to lightly touch my arm. “We need to catch up. I want to hear more about Spain.”

“Well, I’m home until January, so we have plenty of time to catch up.” I smile sweetly at all of them, and Jocelyn actually groans.

“This is ridiculous,” she says, shaking her head. “Can’t you two just let go of what happ

ened and…make up?”

“Absolutely not,” I say firmly, remembering the dirty look he gave me when we finally did make eye contact out on the field. Unable to help myself, I flipped him off.

And then he did the same.

Such a jerk.

Worse? That dirty look he gave me had been kind of…

Sexy.

Okay fine, really sexy. Which is stupid because I’m mad at him and hurt. I feel betrayed by what he did, yet I find him sexy.

Talk about conflicted.

But there’s something about Eli right now that seems a little rough around the edges. He looks older. Bigger, if that’s possible. Madder, which makes sense, since I’m feeling the same emotion. His hair was already mussed up and, even from a distance, I could tell there was scruff on his face, like he hasn’t shaved in a couple of days. My baby-faced boyfriend has somehow turned into a full-fledged man over the last few months and just thinking about it leaves me feeling hot and flustered.

“What if he apologized to you?” Gracie asks, pulling me from my thoughts.

I study her, this woman who has become such a close friend in a short amount of time. We texted over the entire summer. We even FaceTimed when I got the chance and we coordinated our schedules. She means a lot to me, but I know she was there for Eli too.

And I don’t mind that. He needed someone to listen to him. To give him advice. From the bits and pieces she told me whenever he came up in conversation, I got the sense that she was doing exactly that. Giving him advice. Listening to him.

She would never tell me much, though. I have no idea if he’s moved on. If he’s found someone else. Or multiple someone else’s. I thought about it while in Spain. I was in a different country, all alone, where no one else knew me. Who’d ever discover that I hooked up with a cute Spanish boy?

No one.

But it never happened. I could barely flirt with any guy, let alone allow one to touch me.

“He will never apologize to me,” I finally answer, my voice soft.

“How can you be so sure?” Gracie frowns.

“Because in his eyes, he did nothing wrong, so what does he need to apologize for?” I shrug, hating how logical I sound.