The Senior (College Years 4)

Hayden.

“You love her?” I tilt my head toward the phone still in his hand.

The expression on his face softens as he thinks of his girl. “Yeah.”

“What if she told you she was going to leave for four months instead of spending her summer with you?” I ask. “Put yourself in my shoes. I rarely saw Ava the last couple of years, thanks to her being in San Diego. We didn’t spend a lot of time together. The college she chose to attend is a six-hour drive away. I snapped up every minute I could with that girl, yet she still wanted to bail on me.”

“She didn’t want to bail on you, she wanted to do something for herself. Something that was important to her. An opportunity that could’ve changed her life and allowed her to see a different part of the world. All she ever wanted was your support, Eli,” Tony says, as if he’s speaking on Ava’s behalf.

“Did the trip to Spain change her life?” I ask, not bothering to wait for his answer. “Because it sure as hell changed mine. I ended up losing her in the process and now I’m all fucked in the head.”

“That’s your own damn fault. And you’re too stubborn to see it.” He takes a swig of his beer before slamming the glass down onto the table. “I thought I might be able to talk to you and make you see what you’ve done, but here you are, bringing up all that old shit when I thought you were moving past it. You’re impossible.”

I open my mouth, about to protest, but Tony keeps talking. “It’s not always about you, you know. You can’t put your abandonment issues on her. She wasn’t abandoning you. She was going somewhere else for a couple of months. That’s it. I don’t know how many times we all have to tell you this.”

“I don’t put my issues on her,” I protest, offended. “And I don’t have abandonment issues.”

“Ha!”

That’s all Tony says. Ha!

I glare at him. He drinks his beer, calm as ever. I remember what I said to him earlier at practice, like a little baby. How everyone leaves me.

My big mouth proving his point.

“Hey guys! Here’s your pizza.”

We both swivel our heads to find a cute blonde standing at the end of our table, holding the pizza high above her head. She slides it onto the table, then drops a stack of paper plates next to it.

“Need anything else?” she asks cheerfully, her gaze swinging to mine. Her eyes widen the slightest bit, as if she might recognize me, and she says, “Aren’t you…”

“No, he’s not,” Tony says, his voice short and rude as hell. “And we don’t need anything else. Thanks.”

“Uh…you’re welcome.” She shoots him a confused look before she wanders off.

“That was mean,” I say, as I reach for a paper plate before I drop a slice of pizza on it.

“I don’t know if I could handle watching some hot blonde who gives off vague Ava vibes fawning all over you and you giving her your number.” He grabs his own slice of pizza before taking a giant bite out of it, plopping it onto his plate.

“I wasn’t going to flirt with her.” I didn’t even realize she had vague Ava vibes. “And I definitely wasn’t going to give her my number.”

Tony snorts. “Right.”

“Hey, I’m a free agent. If I want to flirt with a babe, I can,” I tell him.

“You’re not a free agent. You’re hopelessly in love with Ava, like you just told me.” He shakes his head and I hate seeing the disappointment on his face. Now I feel like this guy is my dad and all I do is ruin everything.

Sucks.

“Man up, Eli,” Tony continues. “You’re almost done with college. You have a chance to play for the NFL, which I know excites you, no matter how much you try

to blow it off. Like I said, Man. The. Fuck. Up. Tell her you love her. Tell her you want to be with her. Tell her you’re fucking sorry, bro. Before you lose her for good.”

Eighteen

Ava

What does one do when she’s super frustrated with her ex, who has sex with her and then expresses doubt over the entire hookup?