Defensive Daddy

CHAPTER ONE

SAMANTHA

My life was right on track. Dream job, loving fiancé, beautiful son—I had it all.

The only problem was that my promotion came at a time when that fiancé was too busy loving someone else, and that son of mine was wailing like a banshee wondering why in the hell we were standing outside the door of an apartment he didn’t recognize as home.

Well, that makes two of us, buddy. Because I wasn’t sure how we’d come to be here, either, renting this apartment, despising everyone I came across, and wishing I could figure out where I went wrong.

Maybe I never would. Maybe I was destined to question myself from here on out, knowing full well that, even though I didn’t know what it was, there was something I hadn’t done right, and that something had pushed away my husband-to-be, my high school sweetheart who’d held my heart for more than a decade. And whatever it was, it’d pushed him right into the arms of another woman.

“Come on, buddy. It’s okay, let’s get inside so I can get the rest of our boxes.”

Levi looked up at me with red-rimmed eyes, confusion blanketing his face. It killed me that this would become the new normal for him, for us. Wiggling the key in the knob and giving a shove to the door, it finally opened. In the entryway we stood, both scanning the new place. Empty, white walls, beige carpet. There was nothing truly homey about it, but we would make do.

“Where’s Daddy?” Levi’s voice shook as he stepped in before me, walking around the empty living area with a sense of apprehensive wonder. A smile finally crossed his face, momentarily distracted by the newness of it all. If only I could have that childlike sense of wonder again.

“He’s working, sweetie. He’ll come later to pick you up, though.” I walked down the narrow hallway to Levi’s room and set the box down, sliding my key across the tape to open it up. “Here you go!” I hollered, peeking out from his door. “You play in here while Mommy gets the rest of our stuff, okay?”

“Okay!” He toddled down the hallway toward me in his big fluffy coat. Laughter escaped me at the sight. Through all the darkness and sadness I’ve endured lately, he’s my light and happiness. Tears pooled in my eyes as my emotions got the best of me.

I quickly left his room so he wouldn’t see me cry, leaning my back against the wall as though it might help me hold myself together somehow, if only for a moment. The tears crept their way down my cheeks yet again, but I wiped them away and pulled my shit together. I had to. Not just for Levi, but for myself as well.

Making my way down the lengthy staircase to my car, I opened the trunk and instantly changed my mind. There was no way I’d be able to get the heavier boxes up all those stairs on my own. I grabbed a couple I knew I could handle and slammed the trunk closed. Ethan would have to deal with them for me when he came to pick up his son. It was his fault we were here, anyway.

I peeked into Levi’s room. He was playing with his favorite toy airplane that his dad had got him during one of his business trips.

The thought of Ethan being with another woman during those trips caused bile to rise in my throat. He swore to me those trips were necessary for him to work his way up in the company, and I’d foolishly believed him.

There you go again, I thought to myself. Thinking about him, instead of focusing on what matters. Levi. Yourself. And whatever kind of new life this is that we’re building.

It wasn’t easy to let go of what Ethan had done to me—to our family—and I wasn’t sure I’d ever be able to. Right now, I knew I wasn’t capable of it. There was no room for forgiveness in my heart; it was too full of resentment.

And humiliation.

I’d heard about these things happening—men getting bored with their comfortable, routine family lives and finding someone more interesting on the side. Hell, over a year ago, I’d even been consciously aware enough of the change in our relationship to ask him about it. There’d been a distance I’d never noticed before, and Ethan had started staying later at the office, going on more business trips, focusing more on his work than the family waiting for him at home.

Paranoid. That’s what he’d called me. It’d irked me then, and it irked me even more now. He’d assured me there was no reason for me to worry about us, that we were fine. But, I guess that was easy to say when he had his blonde bombshell of a co-worker keeping him company during all those late-night hours at his office.

The worst part? Everything probably would have continued on just as it was if he hadn’t had the balls to confess to the affair in the same measured voice one would use to admit they’d accidentally killed a fucking houseplant. I would have remained on the same blind path, ignoring the signs and pretending everything would be fine, and he’d have continued to fuck Destiny, or Delilah, or whatever the hell her name was.

But Ethan confessed his year-long sin to me, and then chose that sin over Levi and me.

Which led me here. In this very nice, overly modern, two-bedroom apartment with a confused toddler and a shattered heart. The scent of new paint and cleaning chemicals was strong, and despite the chilly weather outside, I opened one of the kitchen windows a crack to air out the room.

I pried open the cardboard box I’d slid onto the counter and sighed. There wasn’t even enough household items in it to make a meal. To hell with it, I’ll go grab one more box. I’d packed them myself, so I knew the one I wanted.

“I’ll be right back, Levi! Just going back out to the car for a quick second.” From the end of the hallway, I saw he hadn’t even looked up at the sound of my voice, too enthralled with his toy to pay me any attention. Good, at least one of us was content.

I left the apartment again, locking the door behind me even though I’d only be a minute. On the way toward the flight of eight stairs, I saw the silver-tone nameplate on the door of the apartment closest to mine.

C. Henley.

Inwardly, I cringed. I really hoped not to have some crotchety old neighbor to deal with, but I wasn’t really in the position to negotiate. I’d needed an apartment, and this one was available on short notice in a decent part of the city, with enough room for Levi to be comfortable and have the space he needed to be a kid.

I made it out to my car and back into the building in record time. Making my way up the stairs with the box full of kitchen supplies, I tripped, unfamiliar with the staircase, and fell flat on

my stomach. Everything from the box spilled out and scattered everywhere.

“Christ, are you okay?”

I hadn’t even seen him until he spoke, too engrossed in my own embarrassment and utter disbelief at the moment. Then, when I raised my gaze and saw the tall, chestnut-haired man staring at me with piercing blue eyes full of concern, I was more embarrassed than I’d ever been in my life.

Which sparked anger within me, justified or not.

“I’m fine.” I looked away, unable to meet his eyes again as I scrambled to pick up the kitchen items from the stairs and floor.

He ducked down onto one knee, obviously not concerned about the dirt or mud on the floor, and helped put things back into the box. “That was a nasty fall though—”

“I said I’m fine.” I pushed his hand away, heat flaming in my cheeks.

I didn’t see the expression he wore, but I heard the shift in his voice. “I was just—”

“You were just interjecting yourself in something that doesn’t concern you. I said I’m fine,” I snapped, throwing the last of the items into the box. “But thanks.”