Fuck me, her body is pressed up against me.
I'm in fucking heaven. That's not just the fucking adrenaline talking, mate. I feel like I'm fucking on top of the world, going down the road towards the house on my motorcycle as Daphne is holding on behind me, pressing her hot little body up against me. I am so fucking hard right now, it's impossible.
I need to get a hold of myself. I can't fucking keep thinking like this.
She's supposed to be my ticket to stay in the fucking country. Not another heart I fucking break.
Yeah, I know. I know. You're going to tell me I can fuck her and stay true to her. But I grew up with someone else, mate. Someone else I’m looking for. As perfect as she is, she’s no Alicia. If she ever knew how much I think about Alicia, she'd be disgusted and probably never talk to me again. That would be the end of it.
She can't feel the same way about me like I feel about her. That's not who I am. Fuck, remember who you're talking to. I'm the fucking asshole, remember? I don't fall for girls. I don't get like this. I have fun with them. I treat them like princesses. And then we move on. We go our fucking separate ways.
That's right. Don't you ever forget that either.
The bike approaches One57 and I punch in the keypad on the gate to the parking garage, and drive through.
Daphne's stopped trembling by the time I get to the elevator and I wait for her to get off the bike and walk through the doors of the elevator before I relax.
I stare at her ass as she walks in.
What? I just took some guy to near death because he slapped her. I can't stare at her ass just a little bit?
She looks at me and smiles timidly before she walks in.
Fuck me, she doesn’t realize that she reminds me so much of Alicia that it’s fucking uncanny. My heart’s still beating and I think back to the years after pushing her into the pond, where I tried to talk to Alicia. But I never had the courage. And then, as she grew older, and matured into a woman - how I gave up. How bad boy Prince Derrick was too fucking afraid to talk to the woman of his dreams. And now, how this beautiful woman Daphne saw all that rage and anger at losing Alicia through his own inaction come out.
Christ, now she probably thinks in addition to everything else I've done, I'm a psycho too.
Fuck my life.
Alicia
I don't even know on what I should focus on as we head towards Derrick's apartment: the situation I was just in, or the way Derrick's hard rock abs feel under my fingers as I hold on to him.
I'm still shaking, my mind unable to let go of the hardness in Jake's eyes. How the hell did I ever feel something for someone like him? He's a monster! To think that he was ready to... I don't even know what he wanted to do with me! I'm just glad Derrick showed up when he did, like a true knight in shining armor. I don't even want to think about what would have happened if he hadn't showed up.
I know Derrick told me to have my panic button with me at all times... But, somehow, I never actually thought I would end up needing to use it. I guess I was just so embarrassed by the nipple clamp I wanted to get away, and I forgot about it and left it behind. Of course, the Universe then found it funny to throw me in a situation where I would need it badly. In a way, though, I'm glad I forgot about it – being saved by Derrick is way better than being rescued by his nameless security staff.
I hold onto him tightly, my arms around his waist as we roar down 6th Avenue, the bike cruising easily through the traffic. Soon enough we're parking on One57's parking garage – which, by the way, looks more like a luxurious sports car stand than a true garage – and I start to breathe easier.
He guides me towards the elevator and, as I enter it, I feel my whole body relaxing, the adrenaline that coursed through me starting to fade. Within moments we’re in his apartment. I look at Derrick, a meek smile on my lips. What do you even say to a man that might have just saved your life? And to think that the reason I'm with him is to ruin him...
“Thank you,” I mutter, looking down at my hands.
“For what?” He asks, almost as if he doesn't realize what he has just done. “Look... I'm sorry you had to see all that, Daphne.”
He's sorry? Now that's something I wasn't expecting. Why does he even feel sorry? It wasn't his fault.
“No... Don't tell me you're sorry,” I say, my eyes locking on his. “You... You saved me. I don't even know how I can thank you.”
I try and smile at
him, an almost imperceptible flicker of rage on his eyes.
“I will never let anyone fucking hurt you. I'll die before that happens, love,” he says, the intensity behind his voice making my heart flutter. I feel my skin prickling, my cheeks flushing and... Oh, God, am I getting wet? I am, I really am - I mean, how could I not be getting wet right now? Derrick, a man richer than God and with a body more perfect than Apollo, is protective of me... And not only that, he remembers Alicia, my true identity. I still can't understand how he remembers that small young girl from so long ago... And yet, I can't deny it: I'm happy that he hasn't forgotten about me.
And why am I this happy? Why am I attracted to him in a way that I've never felt before in my life? I truly don't have answers for any of these questions... And it doesn't matter, not now at least. All that matters is that I'm safe, back within the high-rise apartment I share with Derrick. And, more important than all that, he's here with me, by my side... He's so close that if I just reach for him with my hand, lay my fingers on his chest and – oh God, why can't I stop having all these thoughts?
Truth be told, I don't want to control them. Not right now. I just want to surrender to this desire that fills me. I know, I know... None of this was supposed to happen. I wasn't supposed to feel any of this towards Derrick, I wasn't supposed to push my job and mission to the back of my mind and let instinct take over... But then again, Jake wasn't supposed to cheat on me and turn into a dangerous monster. Life never happens the way it's supposed to be, and that's not always bad.