His jaw nearly pops out of place he’s clenching it so hard. “No because of how you feel toward me or because you don’t think I could be a good father to him?”
“Both.”
“Raelynn—”
“I’m not changing my mind,” I interrupt. “Jackson doesn’t know he has a father. You can’t just turn his world upside down. You don’t know what he’s like; I do. And I wonder why that is!”
“Okay.” Elias comes around and steps in front of me. “Take a deep breath. You keep yelling and you’ll wake Bree up.”
My shoulders slump and I feel a little guilty.
“What’s the situation here anyway? What are you doing here, Rae?”
That’s it! I dodge around Elias and raise my hand, but an arm is around my waist, lifting me into the air and away from Henry before I can hit him.
“Raelynn,” Henry corrects. “Sorry. Old habit.” He doesn’t sound sincere, though.
“She’s my nanny,” Elias answers. “Get your phone out,” he adds to him. He’s still holding me, making me feel like a toddler since he’s obviously keeping me from going somewhere and my feet can’t touch the ground. “Here’s my number.” My mouth drops in outrage when Elias spouts off his number. Why does he need that? “Text me so we’ll have your number and get out of my house before I unleash her on you.”
“What are you doing?” I ask him. “We don’t need his number.”
“Be quiet,” he orders me.
I can’t believe this! Henry nods to Elias, gets up, and leaves. The moment the door closes behind him, Elias sets me on my feet again.
“Okay, you need to tell me the full story.”
“Excuse me? This isn’t any of your business.”
Elias stands up straighter to tower over me more than he already does. He holds up one finger. “He came to my house.” Another finger. “You asked me to come back down here instead of giving you privacy.” And another. “You said it’s always been you and Jackson. Sounds like it’s time you’ve added some friends. We already trust each other because otherwise, you wouldn’t be here. Talk to me.”
He may trust me, but I don’t know if I trust him as much or if I even trust myself all that much. With a sigh, I move to sit at the table and Elias follows. I don’t have much choice.
“I was sixteen when I got pregnant. My parents immediately disowned me. They were pissed that I was pregnant and that he was the one who knocked me up. My family thought his family had no morals because they didn’t go to church every Sunday. My parents told me to go live with them and they could help me since they’re well off. Well, Henry freaked and bailed on me. I was stuck with my parents, who gave me hell every day, until I gave birth the day after my seventeenth birthday. I was at the hospital by myself.”
I stop and shake my head as if that could rid the memories. “I was able to stay with a friend for two months and then I left to come here. My parents don’t know their grandchild is a boy or what his name is or where I live. I haven’t spoken to them in five years. Same went for Henry. Aside from that brief time at a friend’s house, where I basically just had a place to stay, I’ve been on my own. No one has reached out. No one has popped into my life.”
“Until now,” Elias says.
“Exactly. And I’m sorry, but he’s not getting anywhere near Jackson. He can’t appear out of the blue five years into his life and demand I let him into it. What if this freaks Jackson out? How would I even explain it? What if he tries to take Jackson from me? What if he’s terrible? He doesn’t deserve it.” My eyes water and I quickly wipe away an escaped tear.
Elias rubs his jaw with the back of his fingers while he thinks. “What if he’s a good father? What kind of impact would it have on Jackson to have another parent in his life?”
“Are you saying I’m not enough for him?”
“Not at all,” he quickly says. “I want to play devil’s advocate. Like, what are you going to say when Jackson does start asking about his father? What if when he’s older, he wants to get to know his father and he finds out he could’ve known him all along, but he didn’t because you didn’t want him to? Especially if it turns out that Henry is a decent guy now. I think you’re too lost in your panic over him showing up to make a decision either way. If you want me to watch Jackson for you to get to know who he is now before he meets Jackson, I’ll do that for you, too.”
“I can’t ask you to do that,” I immediately object.
“You aren’t. I’m offering. We’re friends now, Raelynn. Remember that.” He glances at his watch. “Why don’t you stay here with Bree? I’ll pick Jackson up and take him to the rink. I want to take him skating.”
“He doesn’t know how.”
Elias rolls his eyes. “He doesn’t need to know. He’ll be with me. I can help him and get him going. He seems to love hockey, so he’ll be thrilled about this. You can stay here and let everything sink in.”
I want to say no so badly. It’s stupid and crazy. It’s not because he’s essentially wanting to do something for Jackson and me, but because after seeing Henry, I don’t want Jackson with anyone but me. I nod, though. I’d feel so guilty if I was the reason Jackson didn’t get the chance to skate when he does seem so interested.
Elias’s grin is bright, as if I just made his day. He looks ridiculously handsome when he smiles like that. He stands, grabs my hand, and squeezes. “It’ll be okay, Raelynn.”