“Even them,” he admitted, though he didn’t want to examine his own motives too closely. He wasn’t sure he’d like what he would find.
He lifted his right foot and tucked it under his left leg so he was sitting slightly sideways on the sofa. Adele was taking a drink of her wine and he watched her, the way her lips touched the rim of the glass, how the lamplight shone off her hair, the graceful arch of her throat as she swallowed the wine. It took him back once again to the “old days,” when they’d stay in on a Friday or Saturday night and simply chill out.
She turned her head and looked at him, and his heart stuttered. “I missed this, Delly,” he whispered. “I missed you.”
Alarm widened her eyes for a moment, quickly replaced with regret. “I’m sorry,” she answered. “I don’t... I can’t... Things are all jumbled up. I don’t know how to respond to that.”
“I know.” He put his wine down on the coffee table and slid a little closer, close enough that he could reach out and take her hand. “Tonight, cooking with you, eating with you, sitting here...it feels like it used to feel, you know? And that’s something I haven’t had since you left.”
Her fingers tightened on his, and his chest started to cramp. What was he doing? He had to be crazy. But since the first moment he’d seen her again, back at the hotel, he’d been unable to stop thinking about her. First in anger, then in surprise, and now because he wanted to kiss her and he knew it would be a horrible mistake. They couldn’t erase the past or the years since.
“I feel the same way,” she whispered. “When I saw you at the hotel that first day, it was like my whole world came crashing down. I thought I’d done such a great job building a life without you, and then there you were and I realized I hadn’t done that great a job at all. Added to that was my guilt and regret. I can’t begin to tell you how much it means to me that we?
??re speaking. That you listened.”
Speaking. Listened. She was talking about closure, wasn’t she? And he had been, too, until about an hour ago. Being in her home changed things. It was so personal, so intimate. Homes were a reflection of the person within. Hers was warm and welcoming. When he thought about his own apartment, he realized it was more...functional. A dwelling, but not really a home.
Delly was also warm and welcoming. Whereas Dan was simply going through the motions.
But not here. Not with her. He was feeling more alive than he had in months, and he didn’t want it to end. He was tired of going through the motions.
“Dan,” she said, a note of caution in her voice, but a note of something else, too.
He reached for her glass and took it from her hands, putting it on the coffee table beside his own glass. As he leaned back, he slid over closer to her, so only a few inches separated them on the cushions.
His gaze met hers. His heart was pounding, oh, so hard as he looked into her face. Today had been so perfect. They’d laughed and talked, and being with her had been so easy. It still was. He lifted his hand and put his fingers gently along the side of her neck, felt her pulse beneath the tips. Then he did what he’d promised himself he wouldn’t: he leaned in and kissed her.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
SHE COULDN’T BREATHE.
Adele sat perfectly still on her sofa, trying hard not to melt into his touch, although she wanted to. So badly. Dan, in her house, on her sofa, his lips softly touching hers, as if asking permission. It was remarkably sweet and hurt her heart just a bit when she thought of all they’d been through.
“Del,” he murmured, his fingers sliding off her neck and onto her shoulder, where he squeezed just a little bit.
His lips tasted sharp and rich, like the wine they’d been drinking, and she couldn’t hold her breath any longer. Instead she let out a sigh, inhaled, and met his mouth equally with her own, lifting her arms around his neck.
Once she acquiesced, everything changed.
The first touch of their mouths had been a question, but this—oh, this was the answer. Nothing was fevered or panicked; instead, it was a slow burn, a gentle sinking into it that was heavenly. The feel of him, the taste...it was all so familiar, and yet exciting, too. He was the same man and yet not. Just as she was not the same woman.
He ran his fingers through her hair, sliding them into the soft strands with a tenderness that blew her away. She knew what awaited her if they took this further. Knew how he’d touch her, how he’d sound, what he’d feel like in the dark. A part of her craved that feeling again, but another part was wise enough to know it would be a mistake. A big one. She kept her eyes closed and gave herself another few moments to enjoy the sensation before breaking off the kiss and sitting back a little.
“Some things haven’t changed,” he breathed, his hand dropping to rest on her knee.
“But too much has changed for us to think we can turn back the clock.” She lifted her eyes and nearly melted at the soft, stunned look in his. He hadn’t expected it to be so good either, had he? “Yesterday you were furious with me. Now... I don’t know what to say right now,” she admitted.
“Don’t say anything. Let’s not ruin it, okay?” It was as if they were both worried that they’d say the wrong word and the fragile link between them would shatter like glass. “It’s time for me to go. I’ll go call the cab.”
She nodded mutely, not trusting herself to reply. The words “not yet” sat on her tongue, but she knew it would be wrong to say them. It was better he leave now. Better that she regain her balance and have time to think about what had happened today. The kiss was only part of it. She was smart enough to know that their relationship, if they could call it that, had shifted.
And that with the barriers dropped, she’d caught glimpses of the Dan she remembered, and had loved.
Now they’d kissed. Kissed! Were they crazy? It was definitely time to step back.
He came back into the living room, putting his phone back in his pocket. “About ten minutes, they said.”
She got up from the sofa before he had a chance to sit down again. “Do you have all your stuff?”