“Yes,” she whispered. “That would make me think twice.”
“Then perhaps you understand why I had difficulty opening up to you, Sophia. You frighten me.”
She stopped in the path. “Me?”
“You didn’t realize I care for you? You didn’t trust my feelings were real?”
“I thought the feelings were all on my side.”
Tomas put down the pack. “After all that happened? The kiss on the bridge? Telling you about Rosa? The night in my room? Did you think it meant nothing to me?”
“I…I…” She stammered, off balance. “Of course not,” she replied, but then had to confess. “I mean, you were wonderful, but I thought you were just…being…” She sighed. “Nice,” she finished.
“I see,” he said quietly. “You told me things, but you didn’t trust me. I understand why my silence upsets you. I do, Sophia, and I’m sorry for that. But have you told me everything about yourself?”
Her silence spoke louder than any words could have.
“You did not trust me, either. And what do we have if we don’t have trust?”
Sophia had no words. Was he right? Did he have bigger feelings for her than she realized? And had she passed them off as if they were unimportant? She had trusted him, but had she trusted in him? He was talking about faith, a completely different thing, and up until now she hadn’t separated the two.
“Tomas…”
“Never mind,” he said. “Let’s take a boat ride before we go back to the hotel. This is your only chance, right? You might as well make the most of it.”
He shouldered the pack once more and led the way down the path.
Sophia had felt many things over the past week, but feeling that she’d let Tomas down was suddenly the worst of them all. And
with only hours left, how could she ever make it up to him?
CHAPTER ELEVEN
SOPHIA saw the boat and instantly felt her insides seize. It was really just a Zodiac crammed with people and Sophia had already witnessed the awesome power of the river—how could a Zodiac compete with that? But Tomas was right beside her, and she refused to back out. She could only let her fear dictate for so long and eventually she had to stand up to it. At least this time she had Tomas by her side. She had climbed many mountains this week. This felt like the ultimate test, and she was determined to face it.
She donned the life jacket provided and took her seat next to Tomas.
The tour started with the guide narrating a spiel about the river and falls but Sophia heard nothing other than the rushing water. Tomas pointed out something on the shore, and she dutifully followed the direction of his finger and nodded, but she had no idea what she was supposed to be looking at. Instead, she could only feel everything closing in around her. The side of the boat pressed against her leg and Tomas’s body was an immovable wall to her left. The grumble of the motor was nearly drowned out by the crash of the water, and the wall of river and people pushed in on her from both sides until she could hardly breathe.
All around her there were exclamations of excitement and whoops as passengers got in the spirit of the adventure. But as they got closer to the roaring falls, the cloud of mist darkened the sky and Sophia was surrounded by it as the pilot took them closer, closer, closer.
The walls closed in, dark and with no escape.
Sophia began to tremble.
It had been a mistake. It had all been a mistake. She should never have done this. Why had she thought that this was a good idea? Her breaths came in shallow pants as she fought against the panic. She wanted out, right now. And there was nowhere to go.
She tried to force deep breaths, to visualize being anywhere else, but all she saw was darkness and all she felt was the claustrophobia of being trapped. Drops of water crawled down her skin and she shuddered, unable to stop the shaking.
Then Tomas was there, saying her name.
His arm went around her shoulder, holding her as close to him as their life jackets would allow while all around them screams of wonder erupted as the boat passed daringly close to the falls. His left hand came across and took hers and she gripped it, a lifeline in the middle of the terror. Tears streamed down her cheeks, mingling with the droplets of river water that soaked them all. Sophia fought for logic. This is not then. It is not the dark, dingy basement and I am not alone.
She was with Tomas. The boat turned, heading back toward the docking area and Sophia went limp with relief. It was over. Sunlight reappeared as they drew away from the falls, the warm light of it soaking into the top of her head. Still Tomas kept his arm around her and she kept her fingers within his.
She turned to look up at him. His dark eyes were clouded with concern, his lips unsmiling. She blinked, feeling the tears warm on her lashes as her lower lip quivered. Tomas leaned forward and stopped the trembling with his mouth. The kiss was incredibly tender, and he let his forehead rest against hers for a moment before sitting back.
But he never let go of her hand.