Finding Carson Lee (Oh Captain, My Captain 3)

Either way, I’m not so sure about things anymore.

Chapter Thirty-Three

Kinley

I’m sitting at my kitchen table, staring at my phone. I had texted Carson last night, and I still haven’t heard anything from him. It’s been almost a week since the dinner with my parents and I’ve barely spoken to Carson. The only time we really talked was about the campaign, but nothing personal.

I’m not sure what really happened. I know Mama freaked him out a little, but I told him that’s how she was. On top of that, I know that I should have told him about the promotion, but I really did forget about it.

I send him a text asking if he still wants me to come to the party, but he never answers me. I don’t know what to do. I call Cassie and tell her everything that happened.

“Should I not go to this party?”

“I think you should go because you already said you were going to. Plus, I know that you’re dressed and sitting at the table.”

I look down, and she’s right. “Fine. I’ll call you later.” I hang up and head to my car.

The gate to Carson’s is open and there are a ton of cars, but I’m able to park in my usual spot by the garage. I count to five, fluff my hair, and get out of the car. The heat is intense today so I’m wearing a strapless maxi dress and sandals.

I walk towards the noise coming from the side of the house. When I turn the corner, there is a larger crowd than I actually imagined. Kids are splashing in the pool, and everyone is standing around in groups. I see Carson with a small group of guys, and I make my way over to him. I’m not sure what to expect when I touch his arm. He turns, giving me a small smile.

“Hey, you made it.”

I smile back. “Yes.”

“Hey, guys, this is Kinley Wright. She is the campaign director of the clothing line I’m modeling for.” Carson starts rattling off their names, but I’m not listening because I keep thinking about the introduction. I’m not even a friend. He didn’t have to say girlfriend, but I figured at least a friend. I keep my smile plastered on my face as the guys ask me how Carson did in Utah.

“He was almost pleasant.” I try to attempt a joke but it doesn’t come off that way.

“Kinley!” I turn to my name being yelled, and Tyler hugs me. “How are you?”

“I’m good.”

Tyler introduces me to his girlfriend, who is a real sweet girl, and we begin chatting about all sorts of things, including growing up in Alabama. Tyler even takes us around and introduces us to the head coach, and even the owner of the Blacksmiths.

After about an hour, Carson hasn’t even looked in my direction, and I know what that means. It’s sad to think he’s going to end it like this, but it’s his choice, I guess. I quietly walk away from the party and go back to my car. There’s no point in staying.

When I make it back to my apartment, the first tear falls. I’m stupid. So, fucking stupid. What the hell was I thinking getting with Carson?

Damn it. I knew how he was about relationships and girlfriends.

I shouldn’t have taken him to my parents.

Shit, I shouldn’t have slept with him. I shouldn’t have stayed at his house.

Fuck.

I fucked up again.

My phone vibrates in my hand and I see that it’s Carson. I quickly wipe my face and cough away my tearful voice.

“Hello.” I try to be nonchalant.

“Hey, where are you? I went looking for you and saw your car was gone.”

“Oh, well, you seemed super busy, and I have a lot of work, so I just took off.”

“It’s a party. I wasn’t busy, but I can understand that you left because of work. Thanks for stopping by at least.”