“Hey, Rus, you think you could flip the meat over?” his dad calls to him.
“Yeah, I got it.” He walks over to the pit and opens it. The smell is making my mouth water. I can’t wait to eat. I look into the backyard and I can barely make out any open spaces now. I walk toward Ruston and watch him.
“There’re so many people here.”
“Yeah.” He laughs. “I told you.”
“I know I’ve told you before but…thank you, man, for everything.” I decide I need to stop acting so envious. It’s premature because I don’t know the full story. I haven’t gotten the guts to ask about what I saw yet, and until I do, I can’t be mad at anyone. This is my family. For all I know, I’m overreacting. I sure hope I’m overreacting.
“We’re family, that’s what we do. I’ve told you that. You’re like a brother to me, Austin. Get ready—we’re going to have a damn good time tonight.”
“That’s what I’m talking about.” I grab two jello shots from the bowl and hand him one. We toast to family and nothing else. Family is all that matters.
Chapter 24
Tamilyn
This day has been nothing like I imagined it would be. Ignoring Austin doesn’t fix things. If anything, it makes me look suspicious. My feelings for Ruston are out of control, growing stronger, and I’m not sure what to do. I watch as Austin and Ruston talk by the grill. Curiosity is attempting to get the best of me, and I want to waltz over there and stick my nose where it probably doesn’t belong, but I stay put.
“Earth to Tamilyn.” Hilary is waving her arm in the air trying her best attempt to catch my attention.
“I’m so sorry. What?” I feel like such an idiot. I should have been listening to her. Raegan laughs and a goofy grin spreads across my face.
“Can you show me where the bathroom is? I’ve really got to pee.” Hilary looks a little embarrassed as she begins to do the dance, the one you do when you’ve really got to go.
“Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry. Follow me.” I lead her inside the house with Raegan following behind us. I know she wants to check on Lucas, and I laugh when I see that Mom is holding him again. I hope she isn’t getting any kind of grandmother fever. That will have to wait.
Raegan stops to talk with her and I lead Hilary down the next hallway. “This bathroom is a lot easier to get to than the one upstairs.” I flip the light switch on for her and tell her I’ll wait. When she emerges, she appears much more relieved than before. I apologize again to her for not paying attention.
“So, how are things with you and Austin? I’m not trying to pry but it seems a little strained.”
I stop walking and turn to face her. Man, she’s got some kind of radar attached to her. “It’s, uh, good I guess. We’re nothing official. I thought he was going to want to go have a drink after the fight but he said he was going home. Being here now is the first time I’ve seen him since last night.”
“Well, I know Lance is sometimes worn out after a fight, so that’s normal. Something I’ve just learned to live with.”
I nod in understanding and pray she doesn’t bring up Austin anymore. I don’t think I could admit everything to her for fear she may think poorly of me. If I tell her, would she go back and tell Lance who in return would tell Austin? Welcome to the cluster fuck that has become my life.
I walk back into the kitchen but no one is in there anymore. They’ve all moved outside where the party is happening. Hilary and I walk back out, and I notice Austin and Ruston still talking. At least they’re laughing so I know it isn’t all serious. I grab a couple of jello shots to try to numb my nerves. I look up and Ruston is walking up to me, while Austin is nowhere around. I wonder if I’m being set up to fail. There’re so many people out here, anyone could see the wrong move.
“Where’d you disappear to, Tammy Lou?”
“Oh, Hilary wanted to know where the bathroom was. Where’s Austin?”
“He took my truck to the store real quick.” He looks around. “Follow me.”
He grabs my hand and leads me inside. I take one quick look back but no one notices we’re both disappearing. Lance and Garrett are deep into a conversation and Hilary and Raegan are alongside them. Ruston doesn’t stop until we get upstairs and are standing in front of my bedroom door. He opens it and we step inside. Still holding onto my hand, he shuts the door and then leads us over to my bed. My throat goes dry as he sits. He’s still holding my hand so I know I need to sit too. I shouldn’t be so damn nervous around him but I can’t control myself. He lets go of my hand and brushes my hair behind my ear. My eyes close and a sigh escapes my lips. My God, what he does to me.
“I can’t keep this secret anymore, Tamilyn. I want you to be mine. Only mine, no more Austin. I think we need to come clean tonight.”
Come clean? What the hell is he thinking? My heart begins racing in my chest. So many things could go wrong if we come clean tonight, and I’m not ready to deal with those consequences. Not with all these people here. “Ruston, we can’t tonight. What if it goes badly?”
“So you’re saying you would come clean and be done with him?” He raises his eyebrow before leaning down to softly kiss my neck. His lips on my skin send volts of electricity through my veins.
I nod. “I can’t stop thinking about you, Ruston. It’s not fair to him. I only want you.”
“Good girl.” He crashes his lips against mine and our hands begin feverishly moving around each other.
He reaches for my shirt first, almost ripping it off. I can feel my breasts rising and falling with each breath I take. “Ruston, what are we doing?” I breathe heavily.