Sex and Vanity

“Ha! Chad’s a mighty generous breakup gift.”

“The cost of this car to someone like Cecil is like the cost of a bag of Cheetos to you and me.”

“Yes, I gather that’s why the Ortiz sisters had a hard time believing Cecil wouldn’t be dropping in to visit you during the grand expedition, especially when he’s got his own jet. I don’t get why you won’t tell them about your breakup. I’m sure they already suspect. I could see it in Mercedes’s face. She doesn’t say as much as Paloma, but she’s very astute.”

“I’ll tell them after we’ve left New York, Mom,” Lucie said. Why am I going to spend four months traveling through Central Asia with two nice ladies I’ve just lied to? Why the hell can’t I get Cornelia Guest’s words out of my head? “The only person you’re deceiving is yourself.”

“What’s the big secret? You finally dumped Cecil and we should all be celebrating. I always thought you were too young to be getting married anyway.”

“Well, that’s what I realized too. I am too young, and I want to enjoy the rest of my twenties. As you know, I’m going to be twenty-five next year, and that’s when the Churchill trust kicks in. Maybe I’ll use that money and get a place in LA.” The only person you’re deceiving is yourself.

“LA? You want to move to LA? Why would you want to move to a place that’s devoid of culture and has no seasons?”

“It’s not devoid of culture. The food scene’s exploding and so is the art scene.* So many artists I know have moved out there, and they’re all loving it. I can’t wait to try it out.” The only person you’re deceiving is yourself.

“You want to use your trust fund to buy a house in a city that’s full of wildfires and earthquakes? Really smart, Lucie. But I suppose your moving there and having your house burn to the ground is the price we’ll have to pay for getting rid of Cecil.” Marian sighed.

“Mom, tell me, why in all the years that I was dating Cecil did you never express to me how much you hated him?”

“I never hated him, Lucie. He irritated me to no end, but I could see that he was a wounded bird, so I felt sorry for him. That father of his clearly did a number on him while he was around. Besides, what would have been the point of my saying anything? You seemed to like him, and he worshipped the ground you walked on. I didn’t want to come between the both of you.”

“But you’re a Chinese mother. Isn’t it your job to come between us?”

“Ha! I’ve gone out of my way not to be a Chinese mother, you know that!”

“Why is that, Mom?”

“What? Would you prefer me to be some sort of Tiger Mom and drag you down to Chinatown every Saturday for Mandarin classes and force you to take classical Chinese dance? Not allow you to have sleepovers or have a phone or date any white boys until you were thirty? Because that’s how I grew to resent my mother.”

“Wow. Sounds like Freddie and I dodged a bullet.”

“You sure did. You guys hit the jackpot when you got me as your bad mama.”

Driving down Main Street in East Hampton, Marian suddenly made a right turn on Dunemere Lane.

“Where are you going?”

“Oh, Charlotte texted as we were leaving the city.

She was at the Maidstone meeting up with a friend, and she wanted to catch a ride back with us.”

“There’s no room, Mom.”

“Well, you could squeeze into the bucket seat in the back for a few minutes, can’t you?”

“Why can’t Charlotte just take a cab like everyone else? She’s so cheap! And of course she’s richer than all of us put together.”

“Stop complaining. We’re almost there and I did promise her.”

“Can you put the top down if I’m going to have to squeeze in the back?” Lucie asked.

“If you can figure out how to get the top down, you can have the top down,” Marian replied.

“How many PhDs do you have? See, it’s this button right here,” Lucie said, reaching for a switch on the center console. The convertible roof of the car began to retract in the most elegant manner. As the view opened up around them, they drove passed Cissinghurst, and through the hedges Lucie glimpsed several moving trucks parked in the driveway and men carrying Goyard suitcases out the front door. Lucie said nothing, but a sudden panic washed over her.

The car pulled up to the quietly dignified entrance of the Maidstone Club. “Go get Charlotte, please,” Marian said. Lucie hopped out of the car and ran into the clubhouse. A minute later, she reappeared.

“No sign of Charlotte, Mom. There’s hardly anybody inside the club right now. They’re in the midst of switching over to dinner.”