“Ben—”
“I care about you, Luna, more than you know. I think we could have a good life together, and honey, one thing you can be sure of with me is that I won’t leave you stranded. I’ll be here for you come hell or high water.”
“I know that, Ben,” I answer softly.
“You might think you know Gavin, but thirteen years is a long time,” he says, echoing thoughts and doubts I’ve been having myself. “You’ve got to decide if you’re going to look in your past for the answers or move forward with me. Until you decide that, I’m not sure we have much more to talk about.”
“Ben, I promise I am trying to work through all of this,” I tell him, feeling lame for the response, but knowing that it’s the only solid truth I can give him.
“You know where I’m at, Luna,” he says quietly and then there’s a click on the phone, telling me he’s gone.
I close my eyes and drop my head down wishing life could be easier. Then I slowly raise up and look into the mirror. The woman staring back at me has changed a lot in the last thirteen years. The one thing that hasn’t changed is she’s trying to look good because she’s going to see Gavin tonight…
Am I doing the right thing?
I don’t really have an answer. I just know I don’t have a choice. Joshua wants to get to know Gavin and I won’t stop that…
Gavin
I’m nervous as hell.
I’m standing outside of Luna’s with a large pizza in my hand, wearing jeans and a button-down shirt but putting a blazer over that because I didn’t want to appear like I didn’t even think about tonight being special to me—and how fucked up is that?
I’ve never given a damn as to what I wear, and I know a twelve-year-old kid probably could care less.
My palms are sweaty, and I swear my heart is beating so hard that I hear it echoing in my ears while I’m knocking on the door. I wouldn’t be surprised if I didn’t have a damn heart attack before the night is through at this point.
It seems to take forever, but in reality, it is just a minute or two before the front door opens. It sounds cliché, but when I first see Luna it’s like my damn breath freezes in my chest and the world stops moving.
Luna’s always been beautiful, always taken my breath away and made my knees weak. Even coming back to Stone Lake thirteen years later didn’t change that. Tonight, though, she’s simply stunning. She’s wearing a soft yellow dress that is reminiscent of the ones she wore when we were dating. Her hair is pulled back on the top of her head in a ponytail and her face is soft and simple, very little if any makeup. I have to fight myself to keep from kissing her. My hand trembles with the need to grab her, pull her into me and claim her mouth.
I don’t do that. Instead, I hold the pizza tighter, so the damn thing doesn’t fall out of my hands and clear my throat.
“I know I’m a little early…” I tell her, my voice hoarse, my tension and emotions both running high.
“It’s fine,” she says, but she doesn’t make a move.
“I… uh… if you rather do this another time….”
“No, now is fine,” she says, still not moving.
“Luna?”
“Do you know what I remember the most about our time together all those years ago, Gavin?” she asks, shocking me.
“What’s that, Moonbeam?”
“It seemed like I was forever trying to believe in you when everyone around me was telling me not to.”
Fuck.
“Luna…”
“I made my choices,” she says wetting her lips, her eyes never leaving mine. “And even with everything that happened, I never regretted them, not once.”
“Luna, honey…”
“I couldn’t regret them because they gave me Josh and he’s the single most important thing in my life.”
“I’m glad he had you as a mother, Luna. I’m truly grateful that you are the mother to our child, because as hard as it has been learning I have a son, at least I know he’s always had you in his corner, protecting him and loving him. I know firsthand how special that is. I couldn’t ask for more when it comes to my child.”
“Tonight, I found myself fighting to believe in you despite others telling me not to,” she says, her eyes still staring directly at mine, our gazes locked. “First with Ben and then with my mother.”
“Luna—”
“My choices are all about my son now, Gavin. Don’t make me regret this, please,” she pleads quietly, the emotion so deep behind her words that they make my heart ache.
“I won’t, Moonbeam. I promise you. I just want a chance to get to know my son…”
“You want a lot of chances—with him, with me… you’ve made that clear. I’m just warning you that if you hurt Joshua, this is over. You’ll never get near him again. I won’t allow you to hurt him anymore than he already has. I need to make that clear. I need you to understand that.”