Finding My Way (Beaumont 4)

“That’s wonderful, Liam. Your first gig.”

I shake my head and look at my grandma. I’ve already decided that my first gig will be when someone shows interest in me. Until then I’m just playing my guitar. “My first gig will be when someone wants me to perform so they can hear me. Right now and until then, I’m just playing to get to that point.”

“You’ll be there before you know it.”

Her confidence in my ability overwhelms me.

“Hey do you think it’s okay if I tag along or is that not cool?”

I chuckle. “If I didn’t know any better I’d think you’re asking me out on a date.”

She fakes horror, but laughs. “It will definitely get me on the front page of Page Six if I show up with you on my arm. Oh imagine the tabloids.”

I shake my head. “I’d be honored to take you as my date tonight.”

Grandma claps her hands together. “I must go get ready.” Before I can say anything or remind her that it’s just after lunch, she’s out of her chair and in the house leaving me here to contemplate everything that’s happened in the last twenty-four hours. Two things are for certain. One, I’m hoping Harrison is there tonight and two, as much as I want to see Layla again, there cannot be a repeat of last night. I need more friends than lovers right now and I don’t want to ruin what I’m hoping will be a good friendship.

Chapter 32

I rap my knuckles on the dark gray metal door and wait with my grandma by my side. Her hands are fiddling, making me wonder if she’s nervous or maybe reminiscing about an occasion she did this with my grandfather. Each time I think about him, I want to sit her down and delve into her memory bank, but I know it’s painful for her. She’s lost both the love of her life and her daughter and it can’t be healthy to bring up all those memories.

The door opens and I step back. We’re greeted by Burke who nods at us before stepping aside to let us in. My hand guides my grandmother down the dark hallway. She’s tense and probably wondering what the hell I’ve gotten myself into. I don’t know if this is a trick that Trixie likes to do to people or what, but it wouldn’t hurt to put some lights on back here. Then again, if you’re in this part of the club you know where you’re going, or at least you should.

The door to the green room is open and we step in. Harrison is sitting on the couch, spinning some drumsticks around his fingers causing me to stop and stare in amazement at how adept his fingers are at manipulating a simple piece of wood. I’m lucky to be able to play a chord without looking a

t my finger placement, but here is he as cool as a cucumber, acting as if twirling drumsticks is the easiest thing in the world to do. When Harrison spots me, he stands up and starts laughing.

“Man, what happened to you last night?” I smirk and give a sideways glance. Last night isn’t something I want to talk about with my grandma within earshot.

“It’s okay, Liam. I’ll go and find Trixie.”

My eyes bulge out and my mouth drops open. “W-what?”

Grandma pats my cheek and smiles coyly. “Metro has been around for a long time, Liam. Your grandfather used to play here when it was a jazz bar. Trixie’s grandfather used to own it and he’s passed it down. I know my way around here. I was a groupie once too, you know.”

With that she effectively walks out of the room. I’m going to have to ask her what her nervousness was all about earlier because I’ll be damned if I didn’t think she was scared to be here. There’s so much more to her than meets the eye. I can’t help wondering if she played a part in getting me the call. If she did, I’m not sure how I’ll react. I need to do this on my own. If I can’t succeed in life without someone constantly helping me, what good am I?

“So last night?” Harrison asks. His eyebrow is raised and his arms are crossed. I run my hand through my hair, resting it on the back of my neck.

“It was great. I learnt a lot and now I know what I need to do to refine my performance.” That’s as close to the truth as I’m getting.

Harrison laughs. “If that’s what you’re telling yourself.”

I nod, not knowing how to respond.

Harrison sets his hand on my shoulder and pushes me toward the corner of the room, away from Burke and the girls he’s with.

“I wish someone had my back when I was starting out. I jumped into bed with the first girl who threw herself at me and regretted it the next day. I know Layla’s hot, but she’s trouble and you shouldn’t stick your dick in crazy because it comes back to bite you in the ass.”

“She’s crazy?”

Harrison makes the crazy sign with his finger next to ear and I chuckle. “Loco, like off her rocker sometimes. She has a new boyfriend each and every week and the heartache is too much to bear, blah blah blah. We all hear about it until the next guy walks in. Don’t get me wrong, she’s a helluva performer, but love wise, she’s a bit touched in the head.”

I’m trying not to laugh at Harrison, he’s so animated, but I get what he’s saying. Last night with Layla shouldn’t have happened, but it did and it’s my fault. I let my emotions get the best of me when I knew my head wasn’t straight.

“Did you at least wrap your junk?”

I bite the inside of my cheek and nod, looking away from him. I don’t want to lie to his face, but the truth is, I don’t know if I did. In six weeks she could come knocking and tell me she’s pregnant and there wouldn’t be shit I could do about it, except get a job busing tables. I know I screwed up last night and might end up paying a bigger price in the end. I try not to think about the one time I purposely didn’t use a condom, but I had been with her since we were virgins and knew she was clean.