My smile faded. I hadn’t really considered the proposition yet, mainly because my schedule was already tight with training and the fights themselves and work. I didn’t know how I’d slot in even more training, because moving up higher meant I’d have to keep my game improving too. I might even end up in more fights per week. Anything that helped my visibility on the circuit.
I’d probably make more money from all this increased exposure too, so maybe I could let up on my hours at the landscaping business. But the truth was, I liked not just relying on my fists to get paid. If I got hurt, then what? Better fighters than me had quit after an injury. Fox Knox had retired after he’d gotten his eye socket blown out by Giovanni, though now the guys were the best of friends and practically brothers-in-law, since Fox was living with Carly’s sister.
Still, I didn’t know if I wanted to put everything on something that could be over in a flash. And that was even assuming I’d be able to keep winning.
Only one thing was a certainty in the ring—there was always going to be a winner, and there was always going to be a loser. Which one you’d be on any given day was a combination of hard work, talent, and luck.
Pure fucking luck.
“It’s going to take a lot of my time.” I walked with them back to our huge circular booths.
The music had shifted to something that apparently, they didn’t want to dance to anymore. Or else my predicament was more interesting than grinding up on each other.
“So what? This is an awesome opportunity. You gotta go for it.” Lily pushed me into the booth and sat down beside me, nearly crawling into my lap. “I’m so proud of you, making all your dreams come true.”
I touched her hair, marveling as always at its texture. She was soft everywhere I was hard, gentle everywhere I was rough. She’d been my biggest dream for so long, and right now, it felt like I was having to make a choice. It didn’t make sense. Chasing success in the octagon wouldn’t drive me away from Lily—and JC—but I couldn’t deny the feeling that by picking one, I’d be not picking the other.
“I have a lot of dreams.” I caressed her cheek.
This woman was everything I’d ever wanted. She was okay with JC and I, for God’s sake. Not just okay with it, she seemed to get off on it. For as sheltered as I’d always assumed she was—as sheltered as I’d tried to make her be—she’d just accepted without a blink a status I’d never fully come to terms with myself.
I was bisexual. And I’d found a woman and a man who fit me so perfectly, I couldn’t imagine the next day—never mind the next week—without them. JC, with his occasionally obnoxious, cocky attitude, had worn me down to the point I actually seriously cared about the guy. And Lily…
God, she was my forever. Maybe they both were.
“Yeah, but this one is the one that matters. This is the one that will tell everyone you’re a star.” JC grinned and reached around Lil to slap me on the back before he summoned a passing waitress. “A bottle of Dom for the table, please.”
The others arrived, laughing and flushed from their exertions on the dance floor.
He glanced at Carly and pointed. “And a giant pitcher of OJ for the pregnacious one, please. Thank you.”
“Pregnacious?” Carly cupped her round belly and laughed. “Yeah, I guess that fits.”
“Dom?” Jenna slid into the other side of the booth, followed by Daniel. Giovanni slid in next, allowing Carly to stay on the end, probably for ease of bathroom trips.
I’d heard more than I’d ever wanted to about a pregnant woman’s bladder since we’d arrived tonight, that was for certain.
“Yes, we’re celebrating.” JC lifted his brows at me. “You gonna tell them or should I?”
Years of scrutiny by the kids in the neighborhood had caused me to turn away from too much attention. In the ring was different. That was the one place I was supposed to stand out. But everywhere else, I blended in with the shadows by choice.
At least I’d been telling myself that all these years.
“There’s not really anything to tell yet.”
“Oh, really? I beg to differ. You’ve got an amazing opportunity, and you’re downplaying it?” JC shook his head and spread his hands wide as if he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “He’s got a chance to go to the big leagues. You know, be the guy who makes millions on fucking pay-per-view.”
Giovanni cocked his head, and I immediately felt like ducking mine. To say I looked up to the guy didn’t begin to tell half of it. He was practically my idol. Not only just because of his incredible ground game, and the way he kept upping his ability every time he came into the ring. He also managed to have a family, and he seemed committed as hell to his wife despite the girls who were constantly swarming him.
That was having it all. Not just moving up in the ranks and sleeping alone. One without the other just seemed hollow.
And if thinking that way made me sound like a chump, then so be it.
“I saw you talking to Einrich the other night.” Gio paused as the waitress returned with our champagne. “Did he make you an offer?”
I waited until the waitress left before answering. “No, not exactly. He wanted me to work out for him, and to go over some stuff. You know how the spiel goes, man,” I added more than a little desperately.
Surely I couldn’t be the only one clinging to realism in this bunch. Getting your hopes up too high just meant you’d end up flattened beneath them if things didn’t work out.