How to Keep a Secret

She was aware of Alice next to her, dusting surfaces and shaking out rugs in the garden.

She threw out the old mattresses and scrubbed the floor and the walls.

They needed painting. Maybe she could do that. She hadn’t painted for five years, but a wall was different, wasn’t it?

Finally, when the downstairs rooms were as clean as she could make them, Nancy turned her attention to the top floor.

She’d bought the place for the upstairs studio, with its acres of glass and north light. That was all that had ever interested her. If there had been a whole football team living in the downstairs bedrooms she wouldn’t have known. That must have been where the girls saw Tom if they’d been peeping through the window. What a stupid man he was for not closing the shutters before he did the deed.

Still, at least it meant her precious studio remained uncontaminated.

She took the stairs slowly, almost afraid to reach the top. The first time she’d seen the place she’d gasped aloud and then realized that the Realtor didn’t seem to know what a gem he had on his hands. Because she didn’t want him to push up the price, she’d muttered a lot about rotten rafters and the number of dead mice and then made him a low offer. The previous owner had died, and fortunately the family were keen for a quick sale.

Now, of course, it would be a different matter. Land this close to the beach was at a premium.

The moment Nancy stepped out onto the wide floor boards she felt the same rush of excitement she’d felt when she first saw the place. How could she have stayed away so long? She felt as if she’d neglected a friend.

I’m sorry I abandoned you.

No one had touched the place since her last visit. There was her kettle, still perched on the table in one corner where she’d left it alongside half a jar of coffee, the contents of which had solidified. When she was painting she’d gone hours without taking a break, oblivious to the world around her. She’d finish when the light started to fade and then she’d make

herself a drink and sit in the garden on her favorite rickety chair and listen to the sea.

The tide came and went, washing away the debris from the previous day and depositing more, licking at the sand, changing the shape of the landscape.

She imagined herself as the tide, washing Tom out of her life. It was a surprisingly satisfying exercise.

Alice had followed her upstairs but Nancy ignored her, lost in the moment.

Her footsteps echoed as she walked the length of her studio. This room soared up into the rafters, giving a feeling of space and light. She glanced up, checking the place was still fundamentally sound. There were no signs of water damage. No ominous stains on the wall that might have suggested a deeper problem.

Her paints were where she’d left them. She checked them and saw that although some of the watercolors had dried up, the oil paints were fine.

Now, with distance, she could barely remember that burning desire and elemental excitement that had driven her to put paint on canvas.

The fire was gone and there was no longer a need to escape, so what reason was there to pick up a brush?

She heard the sound of an engine and then the slam of a car door and female laughter.

Lauren and Jenna.

Jenna had been teaching, and Lauren had spent the day scouring the island for bits and pieces that she could use to transform the house.

Nancy moved closer to the glass and watched as they walked together up the overgrown path. She saw Lauren pause to point something out and Jenna nod in agreement.

Sisters.

Would life have been easier if she’d had a sister? It would have been good to have someone to share things with. Someone you could trust no matter what. Someone by your side through thick and thin.

She’d been wrong to worry about her children so much. They had each other, and they always had. Who would have guessed that it had been Lauren who was the ringleader? The adventurous one?

Did you know that, Tom?

She was certain that he hadn’t known. He’d spent his life thinking about himself.

She saw them pause in the doorway, as if they were afraid to enter.

Jenna said something and Lauren pulled a face. Then she took her sister’s hand and they vanished from view as they stepped into the house.