Into the Darkness

Those eyes that stole my heart and never truly gave it back.

Those eyes that belonged to the one and only Dark Angel.

Seeing him again took me back to places I vowed never to return, the pain I no longer allowed myself to feel. Why did life want to throw a giant curveball when it was just starting to feel right? I was the person standing in the middle of the crowd and the only one to get crapped on by a seagull that flew past. That summed it up in one neat package. Except for the fact that I couldn’t get out of my head the way he looked, the way he sounded, the way he smelled. I felt like I was sitting in the DeLorean from Back to the Future, transporting back to 2006, and there I was again. There he was again. How did this happen? And just a day after Julian proposed to me?

…

“OK, Spit it out. What’s wrong with you?”

“Bull’s, something happened today. I didn’t really want to mention it but it’s eating me up inside.”

“What is it?” she asked.

“I ran into an ex while I was at lunch with Julian.”

“Sounds awkward.”

“Yes it was but it’s kind of more than that. I can’t really explain it. There’s a lot of history between us and we ended on bad terms.”

“Wait, is this Alex?” she said as she spun her head around to face me.

“Yes… Wait, how do you know his name?”

“Honey, I’ve known you for seven years. In that time I could give you a list of guys you’ve been with, none of them I believe were anyone special, except in college all you would talk about in your sleep was this Alex guy. I knew there was something there but I never asked. I figured if you wanted to talk about it, you would.”

“I didn’t know I did that,” I said. “It’s weird, I never in a million years expected to run into him. Now that I have, I have so many questions I need answered. I hate that it took me forever to move on and now it’s opened up again.”

“Sounds to me like you need closure. Did you get his number?”

“No. It took me by surprise. I said some things, not nice things. I just need to forget about this, right? But I mean, it’s New York City. What are the chances of running into him again?”

“I don’t know, a million to one? Charlie, you obviously have unresolved feelings. You can’t have a future with Julian if you don’t sort out your past.”

I understood what she was trying to say, but I thought I had let go of the past. Bull’s knew me too well. Placing her arm around me she reminded me of our fitting tomorrow night which took my mind off what happened today for like one minute. It was so over…well, that was what I kept telling myself. Just like Bull’s said, what were the chances of running into him again? A million to one.

April 2005

Damn this stupid car! I turned my key, the ignition stalling as I attempted to start it. Of all days it had to happen today. It was pouring outside and I didn’t want to have to get out of the car in the rain, but it looked like I had no other choice. It was now or never. I opened the door as fast as I could, pulling the hood up as I attempted to inspect the battery. My dad had taught me a bit about engines and cars. I knew enough to know the sound of the car meant the battery was flat. Fuck! And my cell had died because I was too busy texting all day at school. I was parked around the back of school, the parking lot now empty as students had left over an hour ago. I hung out at the library studying for my finals until the librarian had some sort of emergency and asked me if she could close early. I ran back around and sat in the car, placing my head against the steering wheel. This day totally blew.

There was a tap on the window. Startled, I looked up and saw Alex. He was still wearing his scrubs. I was tongue-tied. I never thought anyone could look so hot in medical attire, but then again he could make a potato sack look hot.

“Let me guess, flat battery?”

“I think so. Do you normally drive past the school looking for girls and broken down cars?” I asked cautiously.

“Geez, Charlotte, lay off America’s Most Dangerous Criminals. I’m guessing you watched that episode last week with that schoolgirl and the knife wielding psychopath?” He tinkered with the battery then walked over to the ignition and attempted to start it. It made the same sound.

“Okay, flat battery it is. I have jumper cables at my place. We can go get them so we can at least get your car

started and get you home.”

He looked at me, confused by my expression.

“It’s okay, I can wait here,” I said nervously.

“But didn’t you watch the episode with that girl standing by the bus stop when a bus pulled over with the escaped prisoners?” he pointed out.

Yeah, I had. Damn him to point that out. It was nearly dark so my nerves were getting the better of me.